


Texting with Broduce

by byunderella



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Dongpaca, M/M, Ongniel, and jinhwi, but if you pretend i am i'll be grateful, clueless guanlin, honestly just an entire mess, i add 2park later on bc im too trash not to, i am the literal definition of pd101 trash, im not even funny, ong being a little shit, sassy jaehwan, wanna one - Freeform, will add onto the tags later
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-15
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2018-11-14 10:00:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11205735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byunderella/pseuds/byunderella
Summary: ong: GUYS I CANT FIND MY PHONEjisung: check your handong: oh shi tong: thanks hyungjaehwan: can u believe we have to deal with this idiot every dayjaehwan: i think i've lost brian cells talking to himong: well i hope you find brian's phone soonjaehwan: fuckaka the mess that is wanna one ft. some produce trainees in group chats





	1. an absolute mess

**Author's Note:**

> characters: lee daehwi, kim samuel, bae jinyoung, park jihoon, park woojin  
> ships: samhwi, winkdeep, some 2park
> 
> in which angry jigglypuff!jihoon makes a comeback, baejin is clueless, samhwi don't know if they love each other or hate each other, and park woojin is unwillingly dragged into this mess

**daehwi** created the group  
  
**daehwi** added **samuel, jinyoung** and **jihoon**  
  
**daehwi** : HELLO FRIENDS  
  
**daehwi** : i'm bored  
  
**samuel** : child i am right beside u why are u texting me  
  
**daehwi:** okay first of all i'm older than you so you don't get to call me a child  
  
**daehwi** : and second of all this is a group chat stupid   
  
**samuel** : well damn   
  
**samuel** : no need to get sassy with me  
  
**samuel** : i saw that eye roll  
  
**daehwi** changed **samuel's** name to **idiot**    
  
**idiot** : wth rude???  
  
**idiot** changed **daehwi's** name to **i hate you**  
  
**jihoon** : can you pls remove jinyoung from this chat ty  
  
**idiot** : are u two fighting  
  
**jinyoung** : i didn't even do anything wrong but he won't talk to me??  
  
**i hate you** : to be fair you do a lot of things wrong  
  
**jinyoung** : wHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN  
  
**idiot** : smh what did he do jihoon  
  
**jihoon** : who  
  
**idiot** : baejin  
  
**jihoon** : idek who that is  
  
**i hate you** : lolol rip   
  
**idiot** changed **jihoon's** name to **angry jigglypuff**  
  
**angry jigglypuff** added **woojin**  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : anyways woojin is my best friend now  
  
**woojin** : whats happening  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : tell them that we're best friends  
  
**woojin** : u invaded my bed and won't leave  
  
**woojin** : i have no idea what's going on  
  
**woojin** : also will you please get ur hair oUT OF MY FACE  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : sorry you're a comfortable pillow  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : so squishy  
  
**jinyoung** : ur lying on him??  
  
**angry jigglypuff** changed **woojin's** name to **jihoon's bff**  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : sooo how are you guys doing  
  
**idiot** : me and daehwi are trying to record sungwoon hyung's snoring. he keeps denying it so we're getting proof  
  
**idiot** : o H MY GODFGH      
  
**idiot** : HE NEARLY WHACKED MY PHONE OUT OF MY HAND  
  
**i hate you** : lol stupid thats what you get for tickling his nose   
  
**angry jigglypuff** : send it  
  
**idiot** sent a video file  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : i cant even see anything  
  
**i hate you** : it doesn't even matter smh we were recording his snoring  
  
**jinyoung** : are u gonna keep ignoring me wink  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : hahaha muel's phone dropping at the end   
  
**jihoon's bff** : wow that's worse than daniel hyung's sleep talking  
  
**i hate you** : woojin you literally dance in ur sleep stop sleep-habit shaming  
  
**jihoon's bff** : wtf why you gotta expose me   
  
**jihoon's bff** : and btw that rarely happens   
  
**i hate you** : you fell off your bed once cause you were trying to imitate daniel hyung's hand spin   
  
**idiot** : omg  
  
**jihoon's bff** : really daehwi  
  
**jihoon's bff** : ur gonna be like that  
  
**i hate you** : lol love you  
  
**idiot** : um??? im right here u jerk  
  
**i hate you** : yeah so?  
  
**idiot** : -______-  
  
**idiot** : fine i guess i'll love jihoon then  
  
**jinyoung** : nah you all suck jihoon loves me  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : shut up i'm a woojin stan  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : oppa sign~  
  
**jihoon's bff** : oh my go d  
  
**jihoon's bff** : this is an absolute mess  
  
**jihoon's bff** : let me know when u guys sort out ur love square im out

 **jihoon's bff** has left the group 

 **angry jigglypuff** : dsfldjsADIUFHG;DHK  
  
**idiot** : what  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : hE TRIED TO PUSH ME OFF OF THE BED  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : and then he realized half way that we were on the top bunk and caught me in time  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : i almost died  
  
**i hate you** : this is all your fault jinyoung  
  
**i hate you** : thanks to your playboy ways you almost killed jihoon  
  
**jinyoung** : wym im so loyal to wink  
  
**jinyoung** : right?  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : you were all cuddly with guanlin yesterday  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : are you really trying to say you're loyal  
  
**jinyoung** : is that what this is about  
  
**jinyoung** : are u jealous (((:  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : no shut up i don't even know you  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : i only know a park woojin  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : even if he just almost killed me bc at least he saved me  
  
**jinyoung** : im sorry okay??  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : nah  
  
**i hate you** : i started this group chat but i'm feeling very left out right now  
  
**i hate you** : this was supposed to be a safe place not a lover's quarrel ring  
  
**i hate you** : i just wanted to talk about music or something  
  
**i hate you** : but what do i get? a mess. a mess is what i get  
  
**jinyoung** : what do u mean "nah" what else do u want me to do  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : add on, your apology isn't good enough  
  
**jinyoung** : okay but ur literally koala hugging woojin in bed rn so aren't we even?  
  
**idiot** : oh my god  
  
**idiot** : is tired  
  
**idiot** : can u please make up already i have some dank memes to discuss before bed  
  
**i hate you** : muel shut up   
  
**i hate you** : this group chat is not a place for your overused memes  
  
**idiot** : oh so you wanna start fighting too?  
  
**i hate you** : start? we've been fighting since day 1 if you haven't already noticed  
  
**idiot** : but you love me :D  
  
**i hate you** : ya but i also hate you so shut up  
  
**idiot** : ugh ur such a tsundere, life is so hard w u  
  
**i hate you** : but you still put up with me so i guess the joke is on you lolol  
  
**i hate you** : anyways winkdeep please continue so we can end this  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : he didn't even finish his apology  
  
**jinyoung** : im sorry for hugging guanlin yesterday i'll give u twice as many hugs tmrw okay??  
  
**jinyoung** : hello  
  
**jinyoung** : pls do not screen me i am trying here  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : ..fine, i accept your apology.  
  
**angry jigglypuff** : but woojin fell asleep and won't let me out of his grip so i'm stuck here lol whoops goodnight  
  
**jinyoung** : ????  
  
**idiot** : wELP  
  
**idiot** : guess its time for us to sleep too  
  
**i hate you** : goodnight jinyoung~  
  
**i hate you** sent audio file _EXO - Playboy_  
  
**jinyoung** : i hate you all


	2. story time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> characters: wanna one members
> 
> basically ong is a troll and everyone hates him

**ong** : guys

 **ong** : guys

 **ong** : guysss

 **jaehwan** : ur annoying what do u want  
   
**ong** : lets do improv story time

 **jaehwan** : why do u suddenly wanna write a story 

 **ong** : because im bored and this chat is dead 

 **ong:** so its time to spice things up

 **jaehwan** : ur story writing isn't exactly what i'd call spicy

 **jaehwan** : ur very vanilla

 **ong** : eXCUSE ME 

 **ong** : i am probably the kinkiest one here if we're being honest

 **daniel** : its true

 **jisung** : oh my god i do not need these images in my head 

 **jisung** : ALSO THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE SO PLEASE

 **jisung** : KEEP IT PG-13

 **guanlin** : what does vanilla mean

 **jisung** : NOTHING MY CHILD PLEASE IGNORE THEM

 **jaehwan** : we're not children ur just ancient

 **jisung** has removed **jaehwan** from the group chat

 **jinyoung** : lol good i was getting tired of him

 **minhyun** : guys let him back in

 **minhyun** : i'll never hear the end of it if you don't

 **jisung** : ugh, fine but if he makes any more age jokes i'm kicking him out of the dorm instead

 **jisung** added **jaehwan** to the group chat 

 **jaehwan** : man what a boring 30 seconds that must have been without me 

 **sungwoon** : actually we all liked it better when you were gone

 **jaehwan** : we all know thats a lie

 **ong** : oKAY ANYWAYS

 **ong** : STORY TIME 

 **ong** : so

 **jaehwan** : shut up

 **ong** removed **jaehwan** from the group chat

 **daehwi** : will that hyung ever learn

 **minhyun** : u ALL SUCKVFKGDKNB

 **minhyun** added **jaehwan** to the group chat

 **minhyun** : please stop doing that he grabbed my phone from me and almost poked my eye out

 **ong** : okay anyways everyone shut up, especially you jaehwan

 **ong** : SO

 **ong** : and im making this up on the spot don't judge me

 **ong** : okay so lets pretend that we all live in different houses

 **jaehwan** : but we don't

 **ong** : i said pretend dammit. in this story we're college students during exam week

 **daehwi** : i'm still in high school

 **ong** : and high school students

 **ong** : anyways, the first scene starts off with minhyun. he's at his house watching tv and then his phone rings. its from a blocked number but he answers it anyways. 

 **ong** : "Let's play a game" he hears a low distorted voice, "Head to Jaehwan's house right now." "Who is this?" Minhyun asks but the other line gets cut off. He tries to call Daniel to tell him about it but he doesn't pick up. Meanwhile, Daniel is in the middle of a league game so he doesn't answer Minhyun's call

 **minhyun** : ouch i see what your priorities are

 **daniel** : this isn't even real smh

 **ong** : Daniel was winning his game but before he could finish, his computer shut off. After calming his rage, he heads to the kitchen for some water. When he opens the fridge, he finds his phone there

 **daniel:** why is my phone in the fridge

 **ong** : he got himself some water, but the water was burning hot and he burnt his tongue and throat

 **sungwoon** : wait

 **sungwoon** : why is the water from the fridge... burning hot?

 **jihoon** : hot water from the fridge what

 **guanlin** : i'm so confused

 **ong** : he closed the fridge and the room was dark. he felt cold, he couldn't move

 **woojin** : the water was hot but he felt cold

 **jisung** : what is even happening

 **ong** : then daniel blacked out 

 **daniel** : wth why did i black out

 **ong** : i don't know

 **ong** : okay lets go to jihoon's scene

 **daehwi** : BUT WAIT THE WATER

 **daehwi** : WHY WAS IT HOT FROM THE FRIDGE

 **jinyoung** : so the water that came out of the fridge was hot..

 **ong** : THE WATER WAS COLD FROM THE FRIDGE

 **woojin** : and once it left the fridge it became hot?

 **ong** : no when you drank it

 **sungwoon** : so its magical water

 **ong** : so onto jihoon's scene

 **ong** : so jihoon is in his living room and hears a sound coming from his bedroom, he goes upstairs to check it

 **daehwi** : he's not even answering our questions

 **jihoon** : why would i go upstairs to check thats bad characterization

 **ong** : scared, he opens the door with his eyes closed. once the door is open he opens his eyes

 **ong** : what does he see???

 **minhyun** : there is too much lag i can't even read the story

 **ong** : JIHOON OPENED HIS EYES WHAT DOES HE SEE??

 **ong** : WHAT DO YOU SEE JIHOON

 **jihoon** : i DONT KNOW WTH YOU'RE THE ONE TELLING THE STORY

 **sungwoon** : ISTG JUST SAY IT

 **ong** : okay onto the next scene lets go to daehwi and woojin

 **jaehwan** : WTF

 **jinyoung** : ONG 

 **daehwi** : oh my god

 **woojin** : do i even want to read this

 **ong** : so daehwi and woojin are hanging out but both of their phones are dead. daehwi goes to charge his but he hears a rattling sound in his closet. he goes to open his closet door but before he can open it, the rattling stops and he hears a scream from the living room

 **ong** : okay next scene

 **daniel** : what are these scene changes

 **daehwi** : his scene changes are worse than the ones in that american remake of boys over flowers

 **jisung** : never mention that ever again oh god

 **guanlin** : but where am i

 **jisung** : yeah where am i am i not good enough for your story

 **ong** : jisung took guanlin out of the city for the weekend 

 **guanlin** : why

 **ong** : okay so jinyoung ends up in front of jaehwan's house after getting the same call. he opens the door and finds minhyun daehwi and woojin blindfolded and tied up on chairs 

 **minhyun** : wHOA

 **woojin** : uhhhhh

 **jisung** : EXCUSE ME WHERE IS THIS GOING

 **jisung** : I SAID KEEP IT PG-13

 **daehwi** : how does jinyoung just walk into jaehwan's house why is ur front door unlocked smh

 **ong** : okay calm down! so jinyoung tries to untie their blindfolds and the ropes but the rope is also hot

 **jihoon** : why is the rope hot now

 **jinyoung** : how does a rope even get hot

 **ong** : jinyoung hears someone come in, its sungwoon

 **ong** : jinyoung: oh hi sungwoon  
        sungwoon: you did this right  
        jinyoung: no i just got here

 **woojin** : WHY ARE THEY TALKING SO CASUALLY IM

 **ong** : and scene cut! lets go to where jaehwan is

 **daniel** : wait but what about me im still knocked out on the cold kitchen floor 

 **sungwoon** : cold like cold or cold like hot?

 **guanlin** : LOL im still confused

 **ong** : oh yeah daniel

 **daniel** : wtf did you forget about me

 **ong** : okay so daniel wakes up but he isn't in his house. he's at a playground near jaehwan's house. and the next thing he knows hes sitting on a chair next to minhyun, woojin, jinyoung and sungwoon in a dark room. the rest of them are asleep but without their blindfolds

 **ong** : they all wake up at the sound of jaehwan's bedroom door opening

 **ong** : jaehwan: ... what are you guys doing here  
        
**ong** : everyone started to yell at him

 **sungwoon** : true story

 **ong** : his parents came out of the kitchen and turned on the lights. they brought out a cake and balloons

 **ong** : jaehwan's parents: GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR EXAMS!!!

 **jaehwan** : i 

 **jaehwan** : hate

 **jaehwan** : you

 **jaehwan:** i hate you so much

 **daehwi** : THATS IT????

 **woojin** : i'm so

 **woojin** : annoyed

 **daniel** : sEONGWOO FDKGHFKG

 **daniel** : U BOTCH

 **jihoon** : i stayed up for that ending???

 **jiyoung** : wthhhhhhhh

 **daehwi** : THIS DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE

 **daehwi** : WHO WAS IN MY CLOSET

 **ong** : your clothes just fell

 **woojin** : i'm nevr gonna listen to yo u ever agaifnf im so mad

 **jisung** : sighs

 **sungwoon** : ok im leaving

 **jaehwan** : SEONGWOO ALWAYS DISSAPOINTS

 **jaehwan** : UR GONNA BECOME THE BOY WHO CRIED WOLF

 **jaehwan** : SOME DAY YOU'LL HAVE A BOMB ASS STORY TO TELL BUT NO ONE IS GONNA WANT TO LISTEN BC NO

 **daniel** : why did i pass out?

 **ong** : you got dizzy from playing too many computer games

 **jihoon** : what about the water why did he get burned 

 **ong** : jaehwan's family wanted to be supportive and take your mind off exams for a while cause they thought you guys were stressed

 **ong** : the end

 **daehwi** : uM THIS STRESSED ME OUT EVEN MORE

 **minhyun** : wow this was terrible

 **jaehwan** : im v angry with u rn

 **ong** : i HEART YOU GUYS YOU ARE THE BOMB

 **ong** : GOOD NIGHT :D

 **jihoon** : WHAT ABOUT THE WATER

 **jinyoung** : how do i leave this group

 **woojin** : same

 **guanlin** : um can someone summarize that for me

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> based on a real convo


	3. i can see it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> characters: bnm boys  
> ships: dongpaca
> 
> will youngmin ever live his typo down?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hondae geondae: donghyun  
> paca: youngmin  
> magu: daehwi  
> snaggletooth: woojin

**hongdae geondae** : i feel so betrayed   
  
**snaggletooth** : why  
  
**hongdae geondae** : youngmin keeps ditching me for sewoon  
  
**hongdae geondae** : guess we know whos more important :^)  
  
**paca** : babe i told you sewoon and i are just friends  
  
**hongdae geondae** : are you sure about that   
  
**hongdae geondae** : when was the last time you took me out  
  
**paca** : yesterday..

 **hongdae geondae** : okay but still

 **hongdae geondae** : do you know how many people are shipping you guys right now?

 **magu** : i ship it

 **hongdae geondae** : dAEHWI

 **hongdae geondae** : DO YOU WANT ME TO DISOWN YOU

 **magu** : no i was kidding ;-; 

 **hongdae geondae** : okay i forgive you only cause you're cute

 **hongdae geondae** : youngmin is a different story

 **paca** : what am i not cute

 **hongdae geondae** : you're cute but not cute enough 

 **hongdae geondae** : sorry

 **snaggletooth** : why am i always stuck in the middle of couple fights

 **snaggletooth** : where did they go

 **magu** : i was in a room with donghyun but youngmin walked in with this look in his eyes so i walked the heck out of there before my eyes could get tainted

 **snaggletooth** : ohhhh

 **snaggletooth** : wait

 **snaggletooth** : thats gross

 **snaggletooth** : why didn't you cockblock they're not allowed to do that here

 **magu** : what was i supposed to do?

 **magu** : you know how youngmin gets when donghyun is mad at him

 **magu** : oh my gOD seonho is walking towards the room they're in

 **magu** : WHAT DO I DO?!!!

 **magu** : SOS A CHILD IS ABOUT TO EXPERIENCE TRAUMA LIKE NEVER BEFORE

 **snaggletooth** : SAVE HIM WTF

 **magu** : its too late he already opened the door noOOO

 **magu** : im sorry i couldn't protect you )':

 **magu** : rip in peace seonho's innocence 

 **snaggletooth** : rest in peace in peace?

 **magu** : oh wait

 **magu** : i think we're good he didn't look weird after walking away so i don't think he saw anything

 **paca** : daehwi you were supposed to be our lookout

 ** **magu**** : um??? i dont remember you assigning me this role

 **magu** : and i am not your servant ):

 **hongdae geondae** : okay well, you are a little forgiven

 **snaggletooth** : ew

 **snaggletooth** : you guys are disgusting

 **hongdae geondae** : shush you don't know anything

 **snaggletooth** : oh i know things

 **snaggletooth** : i blame it on you two

 **snaggletooth** : way to corrupt your children

 **magu** : so you two are good or?

 **paca** : yep donghyun is the only one in my metes

 **magu** : mETES

 **magu** : WHAT IS METES

 **paca** : i meant eyes dammit i hate typos 

 **snaggletooth** : loool wtf

 **paca** : whatever guys

 **paca** : as i was saying i was never attracted to anyone else

 **paca** : donghyun is the only one for me <3

 **hongdae geondae** : uhuh

 **paca** : i thought you believed me?

 **hongdae geondae:**  i said you're only half forgiven, i'm still a little skeptical

 **paca** : i've never even come close to being as close to someone as i am with you 

 **paca** : look me in the eyes right now

 **hongdae geondae** : ur lying

 **paca** : i'm not lying!

 **hongdae geondae** : yes u are

 **hongdae geondae** : i can see it in ur metes

 **snaggletooth** : hAHAHAHAHAH

 **magu** : LOL HYUNG

 **magu** : IM DYING HELP 

 **snaggletooth** : METES IM GJKHGFDKGH

 **magu** : I CAN SEE IT IN UR METES LOOOOOL

 **paca** : this is what i get for making one typo

 **snaggletooth** :  i'm gonna hold that against you forever

 **paca** : it wasn't even a big deal until donghyun said something you fakes //:

 **hongdae geondae** : lol whoops

 **paca** : you owe me a kiss for that

 **snaggletooth** : sTOP THE PDA 

 **paca** : you're not even in the same room as us

 **magu** : METES HAHAHAHAHAH IM STILL ON THE FLOOR

 **snaggletooth** : well i'm doing it for the good of whoever is around you right now 

 **snaggletooth** : nobody needs that

 **snaggletooth** : chill ur hormones pls

 **snaggletooth** : put them on hold

 **snaggletooth** : send them back to busan

 **paca** : uh, not sure seongwoo and daniel are worrying about us right now 

 **snaggletooth** : DOUBLE PDA IM CALLING THE POLICE

 **snaggletooth** : u people should be ashamed of urselves

 **snaggletooth** : there are innocent children in the vicinity

 **magu** : ok but explain ur recent need to cling onto jihoon nowadays 

 **snaggletooth** : wtf i thought u were on my side

 **hongdae geondae** : you hypocrite

 **hongdae geondae** : *side metes u* 

 **magu** : SIDE METES DFGDSK HYUNG STOP LMAO

 **snaggletooth** : *rolls metes*

 **paca** : i've created a mess

 **magu** : GUYS IM ONLY A CHILD I NEED AIR

 **snaggletooth** : everyone needs air daehwi ur not special

 **magu** : u guys are so mean to me )):

 **magu** : im gonna ask mmo to adopt me 

 **magu** : jisung would treat me better than this

 **hongdae geondae** : noo my son come back

 **hongdae geondae** : i love youuu

 **magu** : wdym

 **magu** : u tried to disown me earlier

 **magu** : ur a fake parent

 **hongdae geondae** : i didn't mean it!

 **hongdae geondae** : woojin is the one being mean

 **snaggletooth** : throwing me under the bus i see

 **hongdae geondae** ; wym throwing you under the bus you're the one driving it

 **snaggletooth** : glad to know you know whos in charge here ((:

 **hongdae geondae** : UR LIKE 12 SHUT UP

 **snaggletooth** : im barely a year younger than u stop disrespecting me

 **snaggletooth** : guys we're ot3 from now on

 **snaggletooth** : we're throwing donghyun to the sharks

 **paca** : excuse you that's my boyfriend we're talking about

 **snaggletooth** : fine me and daehwi are gonna be a duo we don't need you guys

 **magu** : if we're a duo whos gonna take care of me

 **snaggletooth** : you can take care of yourself can't you

 **magu** : D:

 **magu:** i wanna be in hyungs' group

 **snaggletooth** : well then

 **snaggletooth** : i guess its time for us to go our separate ways

 **snaggletooth** : it was nice knowing you all

 **snaggletooth** : i'll always cherish the memories

 **snaggletooth** : LOL JK not really you all suck 

 **snaggletooth** : you're gonna regret losing your best member

 **snaggletooth** : how will you ever sleep at night 

 **snaggletooth** : knowing that you lost a gem

 **hongdae geondae** : sooo are you leaving today or-

 **snaggletooth** : have you guys even seen my fancams

 **snaggletooth** : have you ever feasted ur metes on my stage presence 

 **paca** : shut 

 **paca** : up

 **snaggletooth** : honestly where else are you gonna find this kind of talent

 **snaggletooth** : i'm gonna be the best solo artist of the century

 **snaggletooth** : ur faves are shaking

 **snaggletooth** : jay park who?

_**hongdae geondae**  left the group chat _

_**paca** left the group chat_

_**magu** left the group chat_

**snaggletooth** : what the fuck

 

 

 


	4. go to sleep losers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wanna one hyung line being losers
> 
> idek what this is honestly i just needed to update

 

 **ong** : GUYS I CANT FIND MY PHONE

 **jisung** : check your hand

 **ong** : oh shi t

 **ong** : thanks hyung

 **jaehwan** : can u believe we have to deal with this idiot every day

 **jaehwan** : i think i've lost brian cells talking to him

 **ong** : well i hope you find brian's phone soon

 **jaehwan** : fuck

 **jaehwan** : i'm eating okay i can't type properly

 **ong** : you know what the funniest ship i've ever heard is?

 **ong** : daniel and minhyun

 **ong** : like, thats not even close to being a thing

 **sungwoon** : lmao ikr they're so awkward

 **daniel** : wym 

 **daniel** : its a thing

 **daniel** : he shares his food with me

 **minhyun** : uh, yeah ^ what he said

 **ong** : wow

 **ong** : when you have no moments so you gotta reach

 **sungwoon** : yenno whats better than ongniel

 **sungwoon** : nielhwan

 **sungwoon** : or nielsung

 **sungwoon** : or nielwink

 **sungwoon** : or even guanlin and daniel tbh

 **sungwoon** : they don't even have a ship name but i ship it

 **sungwoon** : tbh i wanna fight ongniel 24/7 for being so gross with each other so i ship anything besides them

 **daniel** : stop shipping me with everyone

 **daniel** : im sea sick

 **sungwoon** : shut up ur the one hoeing around 

 **daniel** : wHAT I DONT HOE AROUND

 **jisung** : you're just too nice to people niel

 **daniel** : am i not supposed to be??

 **jaehwan** : i'd appreciate it if you were less nice to me

 **jaehwan** : its exhausting to pretend that i like you

 **daniel** : WHY ARE U ATTACKING ME

 **daniel** : WHAT DID I EVER DO TO U

 **minhyun** : don't take it personally he hates everyone 

 **jisung** : is he

 **jisung** : singing to a mop

 **ong** : if you look to your straight you'll see jaehwan being a loser

 **ong** : even more of a loser than daniel when he's laughing alone 

 **daniel** : r00d

 **daniel** : im just a happy person okay D:

 **jisung** : wHO SAYS "LOOK TO YOUR STRAIGHT" WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN FJKGHSDF

 **minhyun** : he means look in front of you

 **sungwoon** : if you look to your straight w h a t

 **sungwoon** : i choke d

 **ong** : someone obviously isn't looking straight

 **ong** : or being straight for that matter

 **sungwoon** : bITCH SQUARE UP

 **jaehwan** : we all know you love taehyun 

 **jaehwan** : i hear you crying on the phone when he calls you

 **sungwoon** : i hate this group im quitting im going back to hotshot

 **sungwoon** : i dont get paid enough for this shit 

 **daniel** : you don't get paid at all idiot we haven't debuted yet

 **ong** : lol i love savage daniel

 **ong** : he tries so hard to be mean its so cute

 **ong** : but ur not even close to our level yet

 **jisung** : whos 'our'

 **ong** : me and jaehwan

 **jaehwan** : wtf why am i in a category with you

 **jaehwan** : none of you are on my level

 **ong** : wym im totally on ur level

 **jaehwan** : nah

 **jaehwan** : i have the biggest headache because of you

 **jaehwan** : you're constantly on my hit list

 **ong** : wtf you have a hit list

 **ong** : who else is on it

 **jaehwan** : just you

 **jaehwan** : minhyun is on my 'hurt with caution' list

 **jaehwan** : only cause i feel bad for him

 **minhyun** : nice

 **jisung** : he's still hurting you 

 **sungwoon** : and pitying you

 **minhyun** : yeah, but with caution

 **minhyun** : i think its clear here that im jaehwan's favorite

 **sungwoon** : you'll never get him to admit it

 **minhyun** : thats okay as long as i know it

 **daniel** : you know who we should feel sorry for?

 **daniel** : jisung

 **daniel** : the boy is 27 and he covers his eyes during kiss scenes in movies

 **daniel** : like???

 **jisung** : lOOK IM JUST

 **jisung** : SHY OKAY

 **sungwoon** : idk how you're friends with daniel

 **sungwoon** : or how you're okay with using the upstairs bathroom knowing that they do things in there 

 **ong** : what

 **ong** : uhh you know about that..?

 **sungwoon** : seongwoo you're not very subtle with your uh

 **sungwoon** : pleasure

 **jisung** : oKAY ENOUGH OF THIS TALK

 **daniel** : see

 **daniel** : he's wEAK

 **jisung** : IM NOT WEAK SHUT UP 

 **minhyun** : lets find him a date

 **jisung** : honestly how would i even date anyone 

 **jisung** : when im too busy caring for 10 idiots

 **sungwoon** : fuc k i just walked in on jihoon and woojin making out again 

 **sungwoon** : i swear to god these kids have a better love life than me

 **jaehwan** : speaking of dates

 **jaehwan** : lets be serious for a second guys

 **jaehwan** : i have a psa

 **sungwoon** : oh shit jaehwan's getting serious 

 **minhyun** : whats a psa

 **ong** : pissing self association

 **jisung** : wHAT 

 **sungwoon** : PISSING SELF ASSOCIATION SEONGWOO WHERE DID YOU GET THAT FROM  
  
**ong** : is it not

 **jisung** : its public service announcement i'm--

 **sungwoon** : WHY IS THAT EVEN AN ASSOCIATION im tired

 **jaehwan** : so uh

 **jaehwan** : me: is seeing

 **minhyun** : seeing what

 **sungwoon** : OMG

 **sungwoon** : YOU'RE SEEING SOMEONE?

 **minhyun** : wow i guess im not his favorite after all

 **daniel** : who who who who who

 **jisung** : shut up you're not a goddamn owl

 **jaehwan** : i mean is really there anyone that doesn't know

 **ong** : guys its obviously sewoon don't be stupid

 **sungwoon** : bITCHCHH FI! NA! LLY!

 **ong** : he's half single

 **ong** : he's 1.5

 **daniel** : okay but like why are you just seeing you've basically been in love since pd101 filming

 **daniel** : like were you not already dating im confused

 **jaehwan** : we just wanted to take it slow okay!

 **jaehwan** : we have a date tomorrow

 **jisung** : seongwoo wtf is 1.5 that's not half

 **ong** : cause the 1 is him

 **jisung** : that doesnt??

 **jisung** : make sense??

 **ong** : if its 2 then that means he's taken

 **sungwoon** : what

 **jisung** : seongwoo did you pass math  
  
**sungwoon** : so theres 1 jaehwan and half of sewoon??? do u even understand urself

 **ong** : okay anyways jaehwan continue!

 **minhyun** : im cryin g

 **daniel** : don't cry

 **jisung** : defenders unite!

 **minhyun** : ok im not actually crying 

 **sungwoon** : wow what even are our attention spans

 **ong** : tell sewoon to move in

 **jaehwan** : he's been wanting roommates

 **jaehwan** : but like lmao not y'all

 **jaehwan** : you guys are truly A Mess

 **daniel** : says you

 **ong** : ask him if he wants an apartment in hell

 **ong** : bc thats where i reside

 **minhyun** : damn didnt know u were satan

 **minhyun** : actually wait

 **minhyun** : i believe that

 **ong** : i'll give him a place to live

 **ong** : if he pays me in coffee

 **daniel** : ooh it'll always be hot bc hell

 **daniel** : but rip we only drink iced coffee and frapps

 **ong** : o

 **ong** : ya

 **sungwoon** : its okay because if there's hot water from the fridge then theres cold drinks in hell

 **jisung** : FDJKHGFD

 **minhyun** : i swear you guys are like never sober

 **ong** : hey i don't even drink 

 **sungwoon** : then why r u like this jfc

 **ong** : like what??

 **jaehwan** : dude ur constantly swerving when ur walking 

 **jaehwan** : do u even know how to walk in a straight line

 **sungwoon** : its a good thing he doesn't drive

 **sungwoon** : omg imagine being in a car with daniel and a cat runs across 

 **ong** : lmao rip me if that ever happens

 **jisung** : tbh if theres a cat in front of you just drive onto someone's lawn like I do

 **jisung** : except i wasn't tryna swerve im just really bad at right turns..

 **minhyun** : anyways

 **minhyun** : wow

 **minhyun** : jaehwan is taken

 **jaehwan** : half taken

 **minhyun** : round up

 **daniel** : thats inaccurate!

 **minhyun** : its an estimate because feelings aren't an exact science

 **jisung** : it's better to raise your probability

 **sungwoon** : it's better to lower your expectations

 **jisung** : oh

 **daniel** : wow

 **ong** : is this healing night damn why are y'all so sad

 **sungwoon** : don't be like daniel

 **sungwoon** : he fell for seongwoo before he even did anything

 **daniel** : he y thats only half true

 **jisung** : why half

 **daniel** : he smiled thats doing something

 **daniel** : how was i /not/ gonna fall for that like

 **ong** : ;)))  
  
**sungwoon** : oKAY enough i regret bringing you up

 **sungwoon** : goodnight i am 300% done with ongniel

 **minhyun** : yeah guys its 2am we should all get some sleep

 **jisung** : someone make sure daniel doesn't sleep in seongwoo's bed again 

 **daniel** : its not like we're gonna do anything jeez

 **daniel** : there are kids around!

 **jaehwan** : okay when has that ever stopped you two

 **ong** : you guys obviously have never felt the thrill of trying to suppress moans

 **jisung** : OKAY JESU S

 **jisung** : THIS CONVERSATION IS DONE

 **jisung** : GO TO SLEEP LOSERS

 

 


	5. fix your act

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> characters: wanna one members
> 
> we're taking a bit of a turn today prepare your hearts
> 
> im sorr y

 

 **jisung** : y'all i almost got lost on the way home today

 **daniel** : wtf how do you not know the way to our dorm by now

 **jisung** : I KNEW THEY WAY

 **jisung** : just not the orientation from my parents' house..

 **daehwi** : so how was the cf shooting? 

 **jisung** : well, the shooting was okay..

 **minhyun** : good evening

 **minhyun** : how is everyone

 **sungwoon** : seongwoo are you still salty

 **jisung** : sungwoon

 **sungwoon** : what

 **ong** : /:

 **ong** : i guess

 **jisung** : don't talk about it

 **jisung** : i doubt it'll help if you ask him in front of everyone

 **jisung** : especially when jaehwan is also in the convo??

 **sungwoon** : my bad, i was just asking

 **sungwoon** : are you okay now tho?

 **ong** : lets not get into this right now im fine 

 **jihoon** : uh what happened after your cf shooting?

 **minhyun** : did something happen? i had to leave lunch early

 **daniel** : basically jaehwan was being a bitch 

 **jihoon** : ohp

 **daniel** : honestly what the hell was that?

 **jihoon** : why wtf happened?

 **jihoon** : im so confused

 **daniel** : he needs to show up and explain what he was thinking 

 **jinyoung** : okay what is happening

 **daniel** : jaehwan was being a fucking bully

 **daniel** : im so heated like wtf

 **jihoon** : okay wait so how was he being a bully

 **daniel** : we were just playing a round of "of course" after we ate

 **daniel** : and he kept saying how no one actually wants seongwoo in the group 

 **jihoon** : oh what

 **jihoon** : thats it?

 **jihoon** : i thought it was a lot worse lol

 **daniel** : wym thats it?

 **daniel** : he kept calling him useless and untalented

 **daniel** : obviously he was gonna get hurt from that

 **jihoon** : this is jaehwan we're talking about, he always says mean stuff but he never really means it

 **jihoon** : its literally a game where you say mean things to each other 

 **jihoon** : and seongwoo usually knows how to take a joke

 **jihoon** : thats been their dynamic since day one

 **daniel** : yeah but he's still hurt about it

 **minhyun** : i'm sure jaehwan didn't mean it

 **jihoon** : yeah

 **minhyun** : it was a little rude for a joke, but lets not fight guys

 **daniel** : honestly he probably did 

 **daniel** : im lowkey over his shit

 **jihoon** : i don't think it was meant to be taken seriously

 **minhyun** : guys fighting this early is not good for the group, lets calm down

 **jihoon** : this shouldn't even be a fight??

 **jihoon** : we're always playfully saying mean things to each other we don't actually mean it

 **jihoon** : thats literally the game 

 **daniel** : what the fuck

 **daniel** : are you actually serious right now jihoon

 **daniel** : do you even care about seongwoo's feelings?

 **jihoon** : okay i didn't say that i meant that we shouldn't be like this over a game that you chose to play yourselves 

 **daniel** : you don't have to say it

 **daniel** : thats what im hearing

 **minhyun** : guys please

 **daniel** : he's trying his best not to make a big deal out of this so feelings are spared and you don't even care about his?

 **minhyun** : maybe you two should come home first

 **minhyun** : and someone call jaehwan, tell him to come home 

 **daniel** : you know how i am jihoon

 **daniel** : do you really think i'd get this pissed over nothing?

 **daniel** : im only like this for people who are important to me so you should understand 

 **minhyun** : did jaehwan apologize? 

 **daniel** : no

 **jihoon** : im sorry but i'm not saying what he did wasn't wrong i just dont think we shouldn't be fighting over this

 **daniel** : seongwoo's been hurting on his own for a while now tho

 **daniel** : you know he has to keep up his fun image but he has feelings too

 **jihoon** : at least give jaehwan a chance to explain himself

 **minhyun** : yeah lets not be like this towards him

 **daniel** : he's always like this 

 **minhyun** : if he's always like this you should let him know then, maybe he doesn't know that his words might be hurting people 

 **daniel** : why are you making this my fault now?

 **minhyun** : i'm not!

 **daniel** : i wasn't the insensitive prick who started this all

 **jinyoung** : okay this is getting a little out of hand

 **woojin** : can we relax

 **jihoon** : no kidding im so??

 **daniel** : fake? yeah you are

 **jihoon** : ok chill wtf lol

 **daehwi** : please don't start picking fights with more people 

 **daniel** : im not picking fights

 **daniel** : im defending my boyfriend who none of you seem to care about?

 **daehwi** : of course we care about him

 **daniel** : then why aren't you guys on my side?

 **ong** : daniel please, i said to keep it between us 

 **jihoon** : because no one should be picking sides here

 **daniel** : well what am i supposed to do?

 **ong** : can you guys not talk about this

 **daniel** : seongwoo you need to stop overlooking your feelings just to keep everyone happy

 **jinyoung** : wait seriously we need to all calm down for a second

 **daniel** : don't tell me to calm down

 **daniel** : i don't like letting him feel like this

 **minhyun** : we get that seongwoo was hurt

 **minhyun** : but i think you're making it worse by doing this

 **jihoon** : all we're trying to do is see both sides of the story 

 **daniel** : have none of you noticed the way he's always putting seongwoo down?

 **daniel** : i don't think any of you care enough to see through his smile but he's clearly not okay with this anymore

 **minhyun** : we care about both of them

 **minhyun** : and thats why we should listen to what jaehwan has to say too

 **daniel** : he's already said more than enough

 **guanlin** : hyung they're just trying to fix this

 **guanlin** : you guys shouldn't fight

 **daniel** : by putting seongwoo's feelings on the back burner?

 **ong** : guys chill out 

 **ong** : this wasn't supposed to be anyone else's problem 

 **ong** : daniel please stop

 **jisung** : okay wait, calm down

 **jisung** : try to talk it out with jaehwan 

 **jisung** : seongwoo and jaehwan need to talk, just them

 **daniel** : i mean remove the problem and you have a solution right?

 **sungwoon** : no one is the problem 

 **jihoon** : you guys just need to let the two of them talk it out. this doesn't have to be our business if seongwoo doesn't want us butting in and making things worse

 **jihoon** : he can handle himself and his feelings

_**ong**  left the chat_

**jisung** : let him be, he needs time 

 **daniel** : wow jihoon

 **daniel** : so he's basically on his own huh?

 **jisung** : daniel calm down

 **jihoon** : why is everything i say bad to you? i know you care for him and we do too but he already told you that he wanted you to stop

 **jisung** : turning against each other doesn't solve anything, we need to let them talk it out 

 **daniel** : wait for jaehwan to come back and maybe you'll see it my way

 **daniel** : im tired of trying to explain stuff to you guys though

 **daniel:** jaehwan is always saying shit about seongwoo, that isn't cool, you can't just overlook that

 **jaehwan** : ??

 **jisung:** we're just trying to reason this out,seongwoo can talk for himself 

 **minhyun** : please don't escalate this, seongwoo can handle himself and we need to let them figure it out. don't add to the fire

 **jaehwan** : honestly you guys need to learn to take a joke

 **daniel** : wow

 **daniel** : i was just trying to fix stuff but you can't even apologize?

 **jaehwan** : fix? hows that going for you

 **jaehwan** : you've obviously only created a bigger mess out of things

 **daniel** : i can't believe you, you're ridiculous

 **daniel** : how about you learn how to stop bullying people because its not funny

 **jaehwan** : it. was. a. game.

 **jaehwan** : i thought he could take a joke but guess not 

 **jaehwan** : that's not my fault though

 **daniel** : okay i am losing patience 

_**daniel**  removed  **jaehwan**  from the chat_

_**daniel**  added  **ong**  to the chat_

**minhyun** : can we please stop fighting for a second and talk it out properly?

 **minhyun** : we need to fix things

 **daniel** : it's already fixed 

 **ong** : daniel please don't do this 

 **daniel** : as long as jihoon isn't gonna bitch at me again to defend jaehwan

 **jihoon** : are you really starting this again lmao 

 **daniel** : i ended it when i kicked him out 

 **jihoon** : yeah and then you brought it back up again 

 **daniel** : if you wanna leave too then be my guest

 **daniel** : but don't just sit there and pretend that what he says is okay 

 **jihoon** : you're obviously too blind with your "heroic" act to even care about how the rest of us feel about this 

 **ong** : daniel im okay now, i really am

 **daniel** : so now im the bad guy?

 **daniel** : jaehwan gets away with saying shit all the time but when i finally call him out on it im suddenly the bad guy?

 **minhyun** : no one is calling you the bad guy

 **minhyun** : but you can't just turn on people who don't completely agree with you 

 **minhyun** : we all want to help please understand that

 **daniel** : fine whatever i get it

_**daniel**  left the chat_

**minhyun** : um

 **minhyun** : you know what its getting late, i think we all need to sleep this off and try to work this out in the morning

 **minhyun** : jisung tell the kids to go to bed, i'll bring the others home

 **minhyun** : don't stress out too much about this kids!

 **minhyun** : we'll find a way to work it out..

 **jisung** : okay, goodnight 

 

*an hour earlier*

 

_**daniel**  created the group chat_

_**daniel**  added  **ong, jaehwan, jisung, sungwoon, jihoon, woojin, daehwi, jinyoung, guanlin**_

_**jisung**  changed the group name to  **minhyun's surprise party**_

**daniel:** okay so how should we start the fake fight?

 **daehwi:**  someone try to bring it up casually, like ask ong if he's okay

 **sungwoon** : okay i'll bring it up

 **woojin** : rip are we gonna be convincing enough

 **jihoon** : at least this isn't face to face 

 **jinyoung** : yeah i dont know how to keep a straight face

 **guanlin** : im not a good actor either

 **daehwi** : OMG

 **jihoon** : daniel straight up just called jaehwan a bitch im dying

 **daniel** : i dont mean it!!

 **jinyoung** : i don't wanna talk bc i feel like i'll mess it up lol

 **woojin** : this daniel/jihoon fight is so tense im not breathing

 **jihoon** : im not breathi ng either will you stop squishing the life outofme with your nervousnes s

 **woojin** : whoops sorry

 **guanlin** : i feel bad

 **daehwi** : me too D: he's trying so hard to settle it 

 **sungwoon** : daniel how many fights have you had

 **daniel** : none, i don't fight with friends

 **sungwoon:**  you're good tho

 **daniel** : thanks im seongwoo's lawyer

 **daniel** : #seongwoodeservesbetter

 **jihoon** : he will fight for you!!!

 **jihoon** : and also fight you

 **guanlin** : LOL jihoon

 **daniel** : ugh i feel bad

 **ong** : me too 

 **jisung** : same but its okay tmrw morning we'll end it as soon as we can!

 **jihoon** : where is jaehwan man he's ruining everything by not being here

 **jihoon** : lmao just beefs him for real 

 **jinyoung** : its okay at least its working, we just need to wait for him to reply 

 **daniel** : should i leave the chat? 

 **daniel** : or should i wait for jaehwan so i can fight him

 **ong** : yeah you should stay and then kick jaehwan out when he shows up

 **jaehwan** : whoops sorry im out with sewoon and he kept distracting me

 **sungwoon** : go beef daniel!

 **woojin:**  oh god 

 **jinyoung** : wow jaehwan really made himself look like a jerk

 **jinyoung** : "learn how to take a joke" ouchh

 **jaehwan** : kick me out now

_guanlin removed **jaehwan**  from the chat_

**daehwi** : OMG GUANLIN NOT FROM THIS CHAT FROM THE OTHER ONE LMAO

 **woojin** : dead

 **guanlin** : oh oops

_**jisung**  added  **jaehwan**  to the chat_

**guanlin** : sorry hyung 

 **jaehwan** : i was about to fight someone for real

 **jaehwan** : but i cant fight guanlin

 **daniel** : GUYS I DONT MEAN ANYTHING I SAID OKAY

 **daniel** : I LOVE YOU ALL PLS DONT HATE ME 

 

 _ **minhyun**_  to  _ **daehwi** _ \- 10:00pm

 

 **minhyun** : hi daehwi

 **minhyun** : im just making sure your okay

 **minhyun** : i hope you don't get stressed out over the fighting

 **minhyun** : we'll fix things i promise!

 **minhyun** : go to sleep okay?

 

 _ **minhyun**_ to _**jihoon**_ \- 10:08pm

 **minhyun** : hi jihoon i hope you're not stressing yourself out with the situation

 **minhyun** : im sure daniel didn't mean to attack you like that he's just trying to protect seongwoo

 **minhyun** : don't be too hurt okay? it'll get better tomorrow 

 

_**minhyun's surprise party** _

**daehwi** : HE MESSAGED ME SCREAMS

 **jinyoung** : WHO

 **daehwi** : MINHYUN

 **daehwi** : HES MAKING SURE THAT IM OKA Y

 **daehwi** : BUT IM NOT MY HEART HURTS GUYSSSS

 **jihoon** : he messaged me too im 

 **jihoon** : i feel so bad agh

 **ong** : this is so sad he's trying to fix thigns but we're not letting him fdkjgh

 **sungwoon** : guys he said that he feels bad bc unlucky things always happen right before his birthday

 **daehwi** : oh no )))):

 **guanlin** : hyung ): hes too nice

 **jinyoung** : im so worried

 **woojin** : guys we probably stressed tf out of him we're bad people

 **jisung** : tHE GUILT IS REAL I FEEL HORRIBLE

 **daniel** : i do too but lets not waste our efforts, just get through one night we can do it!

 **daniel** : just go to sleep for now and when we wake up we'll get jisung and jaehwan to distract him and get him out of the dorms

 **daehwi** : you guys got the decorations and stuff right?

 **ong** : yep  

 **daniel** : okay goodnight guys i love you all im sorry for fighting you dflkgh i LOVE YOU 

 **woojin** : yeah yeah we love you too lets not get sappy pleas e im not good at this

 **jihoon** : hello hi hurry up and get over here i need my stuffed animal

 **woojin** : im not a stuffed animal )):

 **jihoon** : ur an upgraded stuffed animal that hugs me instead of me having to hug it 

 **jisung** : goodnight kids!! get some rest

 **guanlin** : goodnight hyung 

 **jinyoung** : night

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Woojin I swear to freaking God if you drop the cake I'm not taking you back home with me to Brand New!" Daehwi all but shouts aggressively from his spot at the top step of the ladder, albeit not very intimidating while sporting the huge pink bow taped onto his head. Woojin almost slips twice from the newly mopped floor as he struggles to keep the two boxes of cake that are blocking his vision in his arms and off of the floor.

 

"Well jeez it'd be great if someone could help me instead of attack me!" Jihoon moves quickly from his spot holding the ladder down for Daehwi to assist Woojin with the cake, much to Daehwi's alarm since the older is a little too eager to help Woojin that he accidentally kicks the leg of the ladder on his way there, sending Daehwi almost falling face flat on the floor. Thankfully, Jinyoung shows up out of nowhere with his Daehwi-needs-help radar and catches the younger before he hits the ground. 

 

"Oh shit, sorry-"

 

Daehwi closes his eyes and lifts a hand up to stop him, taking a deep breath and speaking in a calm tone (despite the harsh words), "Shut up. Don't talk to me." 

 

Jihoon raises his hands up in defence, later bringing them back down to smack Woojin in the shoulder when he snickers at him. Woojin stumbles with the cake from the force and Jihoon scrambles to help him save it, while Daehwi continues to glare at them. 

 

"Hey, dumb and dumber, get it together!"

 

Sungwoon slides into the living room from the kitchen in a frenzy, "Guys, hurry! They're on their way up!"

 

The group starts make a commotion as they run in every direction in attempt to clean up the mess and they (thankfully) manage to set the cake down in one piece. The floor is a slip-n-slide as they shuffle to get behind the couches. They sit quietly (as quiet as they can be with Jihoon and Woojin bickering about how Jihoon has been forced onto sitting on top of Woojin's legs as the rest of them squish together in the corner) and wait for Jisung and Jaehwan to come back with the birthday boy. 

 

Daniel shushes them when he hears footsteps approaching. The voices get louder and they hear the door open and close, waiting until Minhyun steps foot into the living room.

 

"I want you to talk to him-"

 

"SURPRISE!!" The bunch squeezed together behind the couch jumps out and scream, blowing on their party noisemakers and pulling the strings on each others party hats. 

 

Realization dawns on Minhyun as Jaehwan clings to his arm with his manic laughter, poking at his cheek and teasing "We got you!"

 

His head falls into his hands in disbelief as the others rush to pull him into a group hug, crying out their apologies and 'I love you's'. 

 

"I'm so sorry hyung! We felt bad the entire time! Blame Daniel and Jaehwan this was their idea!"

 

"Yeah I didn't come up with this I was forced to go along with it don't be mad at me!"

 

"I almost cried last night, I felt so bad!"

 

Minhyun runs and hand through his hair, still trying to process the mess. He looks towards the kitchen where the food is set up, "If that wasn't ice cream cake I'd be so mad at you guys right now."

 

"We're sorry." Daehwi pouts and moves to wrap his arms tightly around the older. 

 

"So you two aren't actually fighting, right?" Daniel wraps an arms around Jaehwan and ruffles his hair. 

 

"He gets on my nerves but nope I'm not planning to throw him out of the dorm any time soon. I think." Minhyun breathes a sigh of relief and Seongwoo is patting his back.

 

"Lets eat!" 

 

The rowdy bunch works their way into the kitchen and Sungwoon lights the candles on the cake. They sing Happy Birthday and Jisung places a party hat on Minhyun's head. Minhyun claps along with them when they're done and then proceeds to swipe icing across Jaehwan's face. 

 

Jaehwan smiles bitterly but admits that he probably deserved it, taking his finger to lick the icing off of his face and kissing Minhyun's cheek.

 

And the rest of their day is spent showering Minhyun with love, everyone calling him an angel, and about a hundred more apologies. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is suuuuper late and rushed because i wanted to get this up already but i kept getting distracted and honestly wanna one hasn't been letting me live the past few days they've been attacking me with content and i can't kEEP UP
> 
> lmao it was probably super obvious that they were fake fighting bc lets be real daniel is a soft baby 
> 
> anyways happy belated birthday to wanna one's angel, minhyun!


	6. fifth wheeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> characters: wanna one's maknae line
> 
> boyfriends!jinhwi, boyfriends!2park and fifth wheel!guanlin

**Wild Childs™** \- 10:00pm

 **jinyoung** : LISTEN UP HOES

 **guanlin** : are you really tryna use that word on us

 **guanlin** : you

 **guanlin** : jinyoung the Resident Hoe™

 **jinyoung** : DUDE

 **jinyoung** : I BASICALLY HAVEN'T TALKED TO ANYONE BUT DAEHWI SINCE WANNA ONE STARTED

 **jinyoung** : i am a changed person

 **jinyoung** : daehwi is all i need

 **woojin** : its tru im so here for winkdeep's death

 **guanlin** : cause you get jihoon all to urself

 **guanlin** : why am i the fricking 5th wheel i h8 my life

 **guanlin** : when will wooseok hyung marry me

 **jihoon** : shut up guanlin he's never gonna marry you

 **guanlin** : I CANT EVEN DREAM NOW???

 **guanlin** : i can't believe you'd stoop so low as to ruin a small taipei boy's dream jihoon i trusted u

 **jihoon** : small?? ur like double jaehwan's height

 **jihoon** : thats 4 fucking meters tall 

 **guanlin** : okay little one you can stop attacking me now 

 **guanlin** : um wasnt jinyoung supposed to announce something

 **jinyoung** : oops

 **jinyoung** : i forgot what i was gonna say

 **jihoon** : woojin is literally sending me gifs of himself

 **jihoon** : i mean ngl im saving them bUT STILL

 **jihoon** : WHO DOES THAT HE'S SO DUMB

 **jihoon** : FDKJH HE'S SENDING ME SEXY BABY OH MY LADY GIFS

 **jihoon** : IM NOT OKAY

 **woojin** : be grateful i know its ur religion

 **jihoon** : ugh ur so gross

 **jihoon** : ur not even that great 

 **jinyoung** : wtf ur head over heels for him

 **jihoon** : i AM NOT

 **jihoon** : I DONT EVEN LIKE HIM

 **jinyoung** : y'all are literally dating what u mean

 **jihoon** : its not dating its called friends with soft benefits

 **jihoon** : like hand holding and all that stuff iTS NOT DATING OKAY

 **daehwi** : SOFT BENEFITS

 **guanlin** : tbh i feel like woojin is the only one pulling the weight in ur relationship 

 **woojin** : thank u guanlin ur a tru bro 

 **guanlin** : i got you hyung

 **guanlin** : one sided loves suck

 **jinyoung** : its not one sided-

 **guanlin** : poor woojin )': loving jihoon when jihoon doesn't love him back

 **guanlin** : its hurts to see u get rejected every day

 **woojin** : ok dude u can stop now 

 **guanlin** : when u tried to kiss him and he pushed u away

 **guanlin** : i almost cried from the angst )''':

 **woojin** : u were laughing the hardest

 **daehwi** : why are we acting like woojin is the one who's more head over heels

 **daehwi** : one time during pd101 jihoon ended up sitting beside woojin and he looked like he was gonna faint

 **jihoon** : JINYOUNG PUSHED ME INTO THE SEAT BESIDE HIM WITHOUT

 **jihoon** : ANY

 **jihoon** : WARNING

 **jihoon** : I COULDN'T BREATHE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES

 **jihoon** : THATS NOT WHAT SUBTLE MEANS YOU IDIOT

 **jinyoung** : whatever you couldn't stop talking about it for days

 **jinyoung** : admit it u were lowkey super thankful for me

 **jihoon** : well ya now but back then i wanted to strangle you

 **guanlin** : doesn't everyone

 **jinyoung** : guanlin just because ur a salty fifth wheel doesn't mean u gotta attack me for no reason ):<

 **daehwi** : so yeah basically jihoon was super in love with woojin for like forever

 **woojin** : did u know about it the entire time??

 **daehwi** : who do u think i am

 **daehwi** : i know everything no one is safe

 **jihoon** : what a snake

 **woojin** : he's a slytherin what did u expect

 **daehwi** : hey i got you two together don't fight me

 **daehwi** : you should have seen jihoon's messages to jinyoung when he was sitting next to woojin

 **daehwi** : 'HE'S SO CLOSE'

 **daehwi** : 'WHAT IF I DIE IM GONNA DIE'

 **daehwi** : 'I FORGET TO BREATHE WHEN I LOOK AT HIM'

 **jihoon** : FHHHHHJHJ STOP EXPOSING ME

 **jihoon** : WHY DO U EVEN KNOW THAT JINYOUNG WTF WHY DID U LET HIM SEE UR MESSAGES

 **jinyoung** : be grateful that i stopped him before he could screenshot for blackmail purposes

 **guanlin** : wow this is why i don't do feelings

 **guanlin** : u guys are scary

 **woojin** : ;)))

 **jihoon** : shut up shut up shut up shut up

 **woojin** : i didn't even say anything

 **jihoon** : U WINKED BITCH

 **jihoon** : UR NOT ALLOWED TO DO THAT

 **woojin** : you don't own winking jihoon

 **jihoon** : im not claiming it im just forbidding u from doing it

 **woojin** : why 

 **woojin** : does it make your heart flutter

 **woojin** : i have that effect on ppl

 **jihoon** : i literally hate you

 **jihoon** : stop trying to flatter yourself

 **jinyoung** : YOU KNOW WHO WAS A SHITTY WINGMAN

 **jinyoung** : SEONHO

 **jinyoung** : THIS CHILD ISTG

 **guanlin** : hey thats my son ur talking bad about

 **guanlin** : lmao just kidding u may proceed i wanna join

 **jinyoung** : I WAS TRYING TO SECRETLY TAKE A VIDEO OF JIHOON AND WOOJIN AND SEONHO WAS BESIDE ME

 **jinyoung** : AND HE PRACTICALLY YELLED "JINYOUNG WHY ARE YOU RECORDING"

 **jinyoung** : AND WOOJIN LOOKED MY WAY AND I ALMOST HAD A HEART ATTACK

 **jinyoung** : and then jihoon beat me up later

 **guanlin** : wow u'd think someone with his grades would be smarter than that 

 **jihoon** : u deserved it ok

 **jihoon** : u were all so suspicious jfkdgh

 **jihoon** : we were just lucky that woojin is oblivious

 **woojin** : wym i knew the entire time

 **jihoon** : shut up stupid no u didnt

 **jihoon** : ur so jpg 24/7 

 **jihoon** : idek how i started to like u

 **jihoon** : i mean what

 **jihoon** : i didn't say that

 **woojin** : wow i love when you finally admit your feelings for me

 

 **Wild Childs™** \- 10:30pm

 **daehwi** : okay so do you guys wanna know how me and jinyoungie became close

 

 **Wild Childs™** \- 10:47pm

 **daehwi** : stop leaving me on read you haters

 **daehwi** : i'm gonna kick you all upside the head

 **guanlin** : can u even reach

 **daehwi** : I Will Severely Injure You Edward

 **woojin** changed **guanlin's**  name to **edwardo**

 **jihoon:** just tell the story otter

 **woojin** changed **daehwi's** name to **otter face**

 **otter face** : okay so while we were watching the first evaluations jinyoung kept dancing while looking at the ground

 **otter face** : and i was like wow whats with this kid 

 **otter face** : i couldnt even see his face so i couldnt even judge if he was cute or not

 **otter face** : and then we met after the m countdown performance 

 **otter face** : and i was like ok whoa this kid is adorable and his face is literally the size of my fist

 **otter face** : and i told u that and u said you had a photoshoot with a lollipop and you showed me pictures and ur face was literally the same size

 **otter face** : i was shook 

 **woojin** changed **jinyoung's** name to **candy face**

 **edwardo:** candy face

 **candy face** : we are not about to start calling me candy face

 **jihoon** : ok candy face

 **woojin** changed **jihoon's** name to **ugly face**

 **ugly face:** i hate ur annoying ass

 **woojin** : u love me ugly face

 **edwardo** : lmaoaoao

 **ugly face**  changed **edwardo's** name to **edwardumb**

 **edwardumb** : i mean

 **edwardumb** : still better than ugly face

 **ugly face**  changed **woojin's** name to  **uglier face**

 **otter face** : ok back to my story losers

 **otter face** : so then i asked for his number and we started talking

 **otter face** : and he'd ask me for help in wingman-ing jihoon

 **otter face** : and then we eventually realized we liked each other

 **otter face** : so basically i'm the captain of the 2park ship

 **otter face** : and you guys are indirectly the captain of the jinhwi ship 

 **edwardumb** : and im just here

 **edwardumb** : i can't believe mnet invited seonho over to see mINHYUN

 **edwardumb** : BUT NOT! ME!

 **edwardumb** : I DONT HAVE ANY FRIENDS

 **uglier face** : what

 **uglier face** : AFTER ALL WE'VE BEEN THROUGH

 **uglier face** : UR GONNA PRETEND LIKE I AINT UR BEST BRO

 **edwardumb** : um jk jihoon can u come collect ur man

 **edwardumb** : he's too clingy

 **uglier face** : i am the least clingy person there is 

 **uglier face** : if this friendship is over thats fine with me im good 

 **uglier face** : im already over it

 **edwardumb** : uh-huh

 **otter face** : OMG another story time

 **otter face** : did u guys know that jinyoung can't daydream

 **otter face** : like he literally doesn't know how

 **ugly face** : how do u not know

 **uglier face** : how to daydream

 **candy face** : idk?? i just see black when i close my eyes

 **uglier face** : im daydreaming like every second of the day how do u not

 **uglier face** : u dont even have to be closing ur eyes

 **candy face** : i dont see anything???

 **edwardumb** : ever??

 **candy face** : ya like i just

 **candy face** : can't create scenarios in my head

 **edwardumb** : im so confused

 **ugly face** : okay wait

 **ugly face** : lets test it close ur eyes

 **otter face** : he is

 **ugly face** : tell him to imagine like a fire or something

 **otter face** : he said he just sees the back of his eyelids

 **edwardumb** : omg

 **candy face** : listen i don't need ur judgmENT

 **otter face** : its okay i still love you <333

 **ugly face** : you know who we should judge

 **ugly face** : woojin

 **ugly face** : this kid doesn't even study but he wanted to be a doctor

 **edwardumb** : omg can you imagine that lolol

 **edwardumb** : i would never get a needle from you

 **otter face** : doctor!woojin hahahaha

 **otter face** : my throat hurts what do you recommend

 **uglier face** : which throat

 **otter face** : wYM WHICH THROAT

 **otter face** : nvm 

 **otter face** : roleplay cancelled

 **ugly face** : he's showing me burn it up gifs now ))):

 **ugly face** : now i really need a doctor sos emergency call an ambulance

 **ugly face** : i dont deserve this

 **ugly face** : im too cute to die 

 **uglier face** : oh don't worry ur ugly so you'll live long

 **otter face** : oh yenno what we should do tmrw

 **otter face** : we should double date at the dog cafe ^^

 **ugly face** : how do we do that

 **ugly face** : i don't even have a boyfriend

 **candy face** : damn the denial is real

 **edwardumb** : what am i supposed to do at home alone D:<

 **otter face** : i mean do you wanna 5th wheel 

 **edwardumb** : uGH nevermind im gonna play basketball with the hyungs

 **edwardumb** : honestly i should just join the hyung line 

 **edwardumb** : bye guys its been great but i have to move onto bigger things

 **edwardumb** : i can no longer be confined by my age

 **edwardumb** : the world is waiting for their next big superstar

 **edwardumb** : and you guys are just holding me back

_**edwardumb** has left the chat_

**ugly face** : well that was dramatic 

 **uglier face** : where was the relevance

 **ugly face** : im sleepy

 **ugly face** : come hereee stuffed animal 

 **uglier face** : i am not

 **uglier face** : ur stuffed animal

 **ugly face** : ))): come here i miss you

 **uglier face** : ...

 **uglier face** : fine

 **otter face** : wow i kind of really hate them

 **candy face** : not as much as they hate each other

 **otter face** : i wanna be hugged to sleep tooo

 **candy face** : say no more

 

 _ **guanlin**_ to _**woojin**_ \- 11:28pm

 **guanlin** : hey add me back to the chat

 **guanlin** : hyung line refused to let me in

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> double update because i haven't updated in a while and i just love 2park so much okay


	7. welcome to hong kong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> honestly there really isnt a set theme for these chapters anymore its just wanna one being the messes that they are

**Pissing Self Association™  - **10:54pm

 

 **jaehwan** : why is this our name

 

 **ong** : cause im fucking hilarious deal with it

 

 **jaehwan** : you werent even tryin g to be funny

 

 **jaehwan** : you're just /that/ dumb

 

 **daniel** : alright stop slandering my boyfriend 

 

 **jaehwan** : you're dumb too

 

 **sungwoon** : yesss i live for ongniel slander

 

 **minhyun** : in this house we hate ongniel

 

 **daniel** : wtf you too minhyun??

 

 **minhyun** : idk i just wanted to fit in

 

 **ong** : well u cant

 

 **jisung** : visuals too otherworldly

 

 **jisung** : we can't relate

 

 **jihoon** : hey 

 

 **jihoon** : i can relate 

 

 **woojin** : oh honey

 

 **woojin** : delusion at its finest 

 

 **jihoon** : fUCK YOU

 

 **jihoon** : im cute dont lie to me

 

 **woojin** : i think you mean dont lie to urself

 

 **jihoon** : binch then why are u dating me

 

 **woojin** : because im the poster boy for bad decisions 

 

 **guanlin** : LMAO

 

 **jihoon** : gUANLIN ):

 

 **guanlin** : i mean

 

 **guanlin** : woojin hyung thats mean

 

 **guanlin** : dont say that about jihoon he's great

 

 **jisung** : so how did rhymer's wedding go woojin?

 

 **woojin** : it was great i had some good cake

 

 **jisung:** uhh

 

 **jisung** : ok but how was the performance

 

 **woojin** : oh that was good too 

 

 **minhyun** : oh what did you perform

 

 **woojin** : uhhh we did nayana 

 

 **daniel** : DID U DO WELCOME TO MY HOLLYWOOD

 

 **guanlin** : welcome to my hollywood was LIT

 

 **guanlin** : i dropped jihoon for woojin when it happened

 

 **guanlin** : park jihoon who?? i only know one park

 

 **guanlin** : park "welcome to my hollywood" woojin 

 

 **guanlin** : the swaggiest of them all

 

 **guanlin** : after me of course 

 

 **guanlin** : amazing

 

 **guanlin** : 5 stars

 

 **jaehwan** : will you stop using that word

 

 **jihoon** : icb this betrayal 

 

 **guanlin** : sorry hyung 

 

 **jihoon** : but omg i still remember my first impression of woojin

 

 **sungwoon** : did u hate him from the get go

 

 **jihoon** : no smh

 

 **jihoon** : how could i hate someone i don’t know

 

 **sungwoon** : u dont need to lie little one

 

 **sungwoon** : i heard u shit talking him behind me during the performance

 

 **sungwoon** : "the brown haired dude can't rap for shit"

 

 **jihoon** : bITCH WHAT

 

 **woojin** : excuse me

 

 **jihoon** : I DIDNT SAY THAT I SWEAR

 

 **woojin** : sketchy

 

 **jihoon** : sungwoon )):<<<

 

 **jihoon** : ur no longer a trainee im kicking u out of the company

 

 **sungwoon** : w H A T

 

 **sungwoon** : i mean fine i was too good for y’all anyways

 

 **minhyun** : wait what are we talking about

 

 **sungwoon** : how jihoon hated woojin the second he saw him

 

 **jihoon** : i DIDNTJFGHN

 

 **jihoon** : actually my first impression when i saw bnm perform and woojin did the Thing i was like

 

 **jihoon** : “I’ve never been to Hollywood before can I have a tour”

 

 **guanlin** : NJKDSFH

 

 **jisung** : gross

 

 **woojin** : i mean i would have taken you on the tour if you asked

 

 **jisung** : double gross

 

 **daniel** : looool

 

 **daniel** : u know if i was singing that song i’d change it to Hong Kong

 

 **ong** : why

 

 **daniel** : bc i’d like to take you to hong kong ;))

 

 **ong** : you’re disgusting daniel think of ur image

 

 **daniel** : hmmm the only image i wanna see is ;)))

 

 **ong:**  kANG DANIEL

 

 **daniel** : i love it when you scream my name

 

 **jaehwan** : i fucking hate you two

 

 **sungwoon** : tHIS ISNT THE FUCKING NSFW CHAT SO CHILL YA HORMONES PLS

 

 **sungwoon** : icb i need to say that every day

 

 **ong** : give up 

 

 **woojin** : wait

 

 **woojin** : y’all have an nsfw chat

 

 **woojin** : why wasn’t i invited :////

 

 **jisung** : bc you’re a cHILD

 

 **woojin** : I AM NOT

 

 **woojin** : JIHOON LETS PROVE IT

 

 **jihoon** : no

 

 **jihoon** : calm yourself

 

 **woojin** : )))):

 

 **jihoon** : sorry ily but calm yourself

 

 **jaehwan** : the only couple im here for is jinhwi

 

 **sungwoon** : THOSE TWO ARE SO CUTE UGH

 

 **sungwoon** : AND THEY'RE SO SOFT AND FLUFFY AND NOT GROSS ITS GREAT

 

 **minhyun** : tru i dont wanna rip my eyes out watching them

 

 **minhyun** : unlike some couple

 

 **daniel** : why does everyone hate us

 

 **ong** : ongniel is science

 

 **jisung** : whO THE HELL LIKES SCIENCE

 

 **jisung** : i BARELY PASSED GYM

 

 **jaehwan** : alright grandpa

 

 **jisung** : you’re sleeping on the streets tonight

 

 **jaehwan** : its okay i have connections

 

 **jaehwan** : howons for life

 

 **guanlin** : oooo

 

 **minhyun** : hey no one is sleeping on the streets

 

 **sungwoon** : why not

 

 **minhyun** : its cold outside and if i end up getting sick it's not gonna be pretty :///

 

 **sungwoon:**  yeah suuuure

 

 **jihoon** : "its not gonna be pretty"

 

 **jihoon** : the fuc k when are you /not/ pretty

 

 **minhyun** : so

 

 **minhyun** : im ready for your first impressions of me

 

 **jisung** : “AN ANGEL?? I NEED TO GET A CHEEK KISS?”

 

 **sungwoon** : “whos that tall beautiful freak i dont like him already”

 

 **jaehwan** : “oh”

 

 **minhyun** : wtf

 

 **jaehwan** : lol u think i remember

 

 **jaehwan** : my memory is horrible

 

 **minhyun** : yeah well i remember my first impression of you but guess you dont get to hear it

 

 **jaehwan** : hmmmm

 

 **jaehwan** : i’ll live

 

 **minhyun** : whatever

 

 **minhyun** : it’s not like i care

 

 **jaehwan** : sounds like you care

 

 **minhyun** : i dont

 

 **minhyun** : wHERES JONGHYUN UGH

 

 **minhyun** : bye im gonna go call him so i can talk to someone i actually like

 

 **sungwoon** : ouchhhh

 

 **jisung** : alright like you don’t hold hotshot above us

 

 **sungwoon** : i

 

 **sungwoon** : well

 

 **sungwoon** : ur not wrong

 

 **jihoon** : where is jinhwi anyways 

 

 **sungwoon** : idk probably in our room

 

 **sungwoon** : i havent moved from off the couch in like hours 

 

 **sungwoon** : ohp daehwi just left their room 

 

 **sungwoon** : wITHOUT JINYOUNG

 

 **minhyun** : whoa 

 

 **daniel** : the world is ending 

 

 **daehwi** : hello everybody

 

 **jisung** : hi whats up wat have you and jinyoung been doing

 

 **daehwi** : don't talk about him please

 

 **sungwoon** : whoa

 

 **jaehwan** : whoa (2)

 

 **ong** : whoa (3) 

 

 **woojin** : why 

 

 **daehwi** : he

 

 **daehwi** : he said he was losing feelings 

 

 **jihoon** : what 

 

 **guanlin** : what (2)

 

 **daniel** : what (4)

 

 **minhyun** : you

 

 **minhyun** : you forgot 3 

 

 **minhyun** : wait sorry thats not the problem here 

 

 **ong** : losing feelings how???

 

 **jisung** : you're literally the most precious thing in the universe 

 

 **daehwi** : he said im overbearing and he couldn't handle it...

 

 **daehwi** : and that we could still be friends but he couldn't like me back as much as i like him.

 

 **woojin** : someone warn him.

 

 **jihoon** : what are you gonna do woojin

 

 **woojin** : someone better fucking warn him because in 3 seconds imma bout to break that door down

 

 **woojin** : and beat his ass

 

 **woojin** : BAE JINYOUNG SQUARE TF UP HOW DARE YOU

 

 **woojin** : TALK TO DAEHWI LIKE HE DIDN'T GIVE YOU HIS ALL

 

 **woojin** : HOW DO YOU THROW THAT AWAY DO YOU WANNA FUCKING FIGHT 

 

 **woojin** : I HOPE YOU'RE READING THIS BECAUSE YOU'RE DEAD TO ME 

 

 **woojin** : DAEHWI IS THE BEST YOU'RE EVER GONNA GET 

 

 **jihoon** : wait woojin calm down 

 

 **woojin** : DONT TELL ME TO CALM DOWN 

 

 **woojin** : "WE COULD STILL BE FRIENDS"

 

 **woojin** : I THINK THE FUCK NOT

 

 **woojin** : WHY??? BECAUSE YOU'RE D E A D TO ME

 

 **jinyoung** : daehwi can we stop

 

 **jinyoung:** IM SCARED

 

 **daehwi** : OKAY WOOJIN STOP PLS WE WERE JUST

 

 **daehwi** : KIDDING

 

 **daehwi:** please don't hurt anyone

 

 **sungwoon** : AND STOP SCREAMING

 

 **sungwoon** : PLEASE

 

 **sungwoon** : WHY ARE U SO PTERODACTYL 

 

 **guanlin** : HAHAHAHA

 

 **minhyun** : whoa

 

 **minhyun** : nice comparison 

 

 **woojin** : whAT DO YOU MEAN "KIDDING"

 

 **daehwi** : uhhhhh,,,

 

 **daehwi** : it was fake???

 

 **guanlin** : um

 

 **jaehwan** : u m

 

 **jihoon** : oh shit 

 

 **ong** : knew it

 

 **jisung** : okay what is going on here please explain yourselves 

 

 **daehwi** : well this idiot thought it would be fun to see if we could rile up woojin 

 

 **daehwi** : enough to get his caring side out 

 

 **daehwi** : because he didn't believe me when i said woojin would literally tear him apart if he hurt me 

 

 **jinyoung** : I DIDNT HURT HIM I SWEAR

 

 **jinyoung** : I LOVE HIM WITH ALL OF MY HEART

 

 **jinyoung** : DON'T SHRED ME 

 

 **jinyoung** : IM TOO YOUNG TO DIE

 

 **jinyoung** : AND I WOULD NEVER SAY THAT ABOUT DAEHWI

 

 **jinyoung** : I DONT DESERVE HIM

 

 **jihoon** : way to go guys

 

 **jihoon** : that was the hardest sigh i've ever heard in my entire life 

 

 **woojin** : im

 

 **woojin** : going to sleep 

 

 **woojin** : jihoon come here

 

 **woojin** : no one else talk to me icb y'all

 

 **woojin** : guess whos dead to me now

 

 **daehwi** : IM

 

 **daehwi** : THIS WAS A BAD IDEA I TOLD YOU JINYOUNG

 

 **jinyoung** : i dIDNT THING HE'D GO OFF LIKE THAT

 

 **guanlin** : who wants to bet woojin hyung is still gonna kill him anyways

 

 **ong** : oh definitely

 

 **jisung** : hey no ones hurting anyone 

 

 **ong** : lmao y'all are wild this is fun 

 

 **daniel** : the entire time seongwoo was whining at me to make popcorn

 

 **daniel** : but how was i supposed to make popcorn 

 

 **daniel** : when there was a hUGE ASS BUG FLYING AROUND THE KITCHEN

 

 **jisung** : are u enjoying this seongwoo smh

 

 **jisung** : and we dont even have popcorn

 

 **jaehwan** : diasppointing 

 

 **ong** : duH THAT WAS GREAT 11/10 I KNEW YOU GUYS WERE ACTING

 

 **ong** : bc im a fellow actor ;)

 

 **jisung** : no more hidden cameras

 

 **jisung** : hidden cameras are banned in this house 

 

 **minhyun** : you're just saying that because you don't wanna get pranked

 

 **jisung** : NO

 

 **jisung** : iM SAYING IT FOR THE GOOD OF THE PEOPLE

 

 **jisung** : IF WE DO ANOTHER HIDDEN CAMERA WHAT IF SOMEONE SNAPS AND DOES SOMETHING MEAN FOR REAL

 

 **jisung** : IM NOT GONNA CLEAN UP THAT MESS

 

 **guanlin** : guys when's jisung hyung's birthday

 

 **daniel** : i'll make the separate group chat 

 

 **jisung** : stop this Mess 

 

 **jisung** : wow i thought guanlin was the last one i could trust

 

 **jisung** : i guess im all alone in this family 

 

 **guanlin** : im very wishy washy 

 

 **jihoon** : yoo u rea lly a e rre

 

 **guanlin** : jihoon always typos so hard when woojin is hugging him

 

 **jihoon** : HI S GRI P IS SOOOO TI GHRT HE LGP WADHTS OXY GNRGB

 

 **sungwoon** : jinhwi is cuddling again we're all safe so gO TO SLEEP IM TIRED

 

 **sungwoon** : MY EARS HURT FROM WOOJIN'S SCREAMIGN UGH 

 

 **jaehwan** : he's a loud ass kid 

 

 **minhyun** : alright says u 

 

 **jaehwan** : even my screams are melodic 

 

 **minhyun** : really will they be melodic when im cHOKING U TO DEAT H

 

 **jisung** : okay we all need to sleep before the death threats multiply 

 

 **daniel** : goodnight!!!

 

 **jaehwan** : shut up hong kong 

 

 

 _ **daehwi**_  to  _ **woojin**_ \- 11:45pm 

 

 **daehwi** : sorry hyung

 

 **daehwi** : i didn't doubt you but jinyoung made me do it 

 

 **daehwi** : you know im terrible at resisting him

 

 **daehwi** : but if it ever happens in the future 

 

 **daehwi** : i can count on you right :)))

 

 **daehwi** : i love you <333 goodnight 

 

 

 _ **woojin**_ to _**daehwi** _ \- 1:56am

 

 **woojin** : i mean i love you too i guess,, :///

 

 **daehwi** : OMG

 

 **daehwi** : THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED

 

 **daehwi** : iM SCREENSHOTING 

 

 **woojin** : WAIT U WERE SUPPOSED TO BE SLEEPING ALREADY 

 

 **daehwi** : <3333333

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LOVE CHAMHWI DON'T TOUCH ME ;;
> 
> ALSO ITS BEEN SO LONG IM SORRY
> 
> i've been super busy working on my 2park chaptered fic and uni started back up but i wanted to soothe the angst from cihp with this ^^
> 
> nominate me at the [wanna one ff awards???](https://wannaoneffawards.tumblr.com/)  
> ty friends ily ♡♡ and as usual, comment and leave kudos ((:


	8. stop ruining nuggets for everyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is inspired by the mess that is pink sausage apartments™ i love y'all even tho you're all weird as fuck and that these are actually things that were said in our group chat wow

**Pissing Self Association™** — 11:35pm

 

 **ong** : my soft kink is water

 

 **jisung** : wtf kind of conversation did i just walk into

 

 **jisung** : what does that even mean

 

 **daniel** : ice is my hard kink

 

 **jisung** : yenno what i dont even wanna know

 

 **jihoon** : good morning kinky people

 

 **daniel** : its 11:40pm

 

 **jihoon** : stfu

 

 **daniel** : aight damn

 

 **daniel** : woojin pls collect ur boyfriend he’s in a mood

 

 **woojin** : he wont even let me hug him ///:

 

 **jinyoung** : get_your_hands_off_me.mp3

 

 **jinyoung:** aka the superior finale song

 

 **guanlin** : wtf

 

 **guanlin** : its hands_on_me.mp3

 

 **sungwoon** : bih u were literally the center of that song

 

 **sungwoon:** how do u not know what its called

 

 **jinyoung** : listen

 

 **jinyoung** : its past my bedtime

 

 **minhyun** : what did u do woojin

 

 **woojin** : nOTHING

 

 **minhyun** : its never nothing kid

 

 **woojin** : what the frickity frack i literally did nothing

 

 **guanlin** : what is frickity frack

 

 **ong** : lay your hands on my neck

 

 **jihoon** : the

 

 **daniel** : not into choking sry

 

 **ong** : yes the fuck u are bitch

 

 **sungwoon** : exposed

 

 **daniel** : chokers and choking are two diff things seongwoo

 

 **ong** : choke

 

 **minhyun** : stop with the choking u freaks

 

 **jaehwan** : he yfgs wjo 2snrs to ear ranwn weith m3

 

 **guanlin** : what

 

 **jinyoung** : uh are u ok

 

 **jihoon** : i think the real q here is when is he ever okay

 

 **daehwi** : i think he said “hey guys who wants to eat ramen with me”

 

 **woojin** : wtf how

 

 **jaehwan** : woq ue si gofd at rhis rhatd mt boo

 

 **daehwi** : um

 

 **daehwi** : i’d rather not translate that

 

 **woojin** : do it

 

 **daehwi** : no

 

 **ong** : do it

 

 **daehwi** : ugh

 

 **daehwi** : “wow ur so good at this thats my boo”

 

 **sungwoon** : tHTAHS WMY BOO DFJGKH DISGUSTING

 

 **woojin** : fhkfdghkdfhg

 

 **daehwi** : aHE M ANYWAYS THAT NEVER.MP3 HAPPENED

 

 **woojin** : whatever you say boo

 

 **daehwi** : HNSJDK SHUT TF UP

 

 **daehwi** : i h8 this family

 

 **sungwoon** : take a shot every time someone says “i hate this family”

 

 **guanlin** : some of us are minors sungwoon

 

 **woojin** : YAA PASS THE WHISKEY WOOOO

 

 **jihoon** : calm the fuck down woojin

 

 **jinyoung** : is no one gonna press the fact that jaehwan is typing like he’s half-asleep hanging upside down on a ledge of the namsan tower by his underwear

 

 **daehwi** : thats,,,

 

 **daehwi** : an extremely detailed comparison

 

 **jaehwan** : hshty up jingyongu im fantsdick

 

 **woojin** : did he just say dick

 

 **ong** : thats all i seeing

 

 **minhyun** : did we ever figure out why jihoon isn’t letting woojin hug him

 

 **jihoon** : this bitch is reading me smut fics out loud someone shut him up

 

 **daehwi** : WOOJIN WHAT THEI UFKCS

 

 **woojin** : WHY DID U EXPOSE ME

 

 **woojin** : its not serious okay im doing this for fun smh

 

 **woojin** : WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WITH A SENSE OF HUMOR

 

 **woojin** : do you want me to move onto to the royalty au

 

 **guanlin** : princess jihoon and peasant woojin nice

 

 **daniel** : protective older bro woojin, a concept

 

 **jisung** : wtf did u all read the same royalty fic

 

 **sungwoon** : wait what

 

 **sungwoon** : why is woojin jihoon’s older brother

 

 **jisung** : um please tell me woojin isnt jihoon’s brother in that

 

 **ong** : waht

 

 **daniel** : what

 

 **sungwoon** : what is this sudden incest

 

 **minhyun** : ????

 

 **woojin** : WHAT INCEST WHAT THE FUCK

 

 **woojin** : WTF ARE Y’ALL TALKING ABOUT

 

 **woojin** : SUNGWOON IM???

 

 **sungwoon** : NO WAI T IM

 

 **sungwoon** :  I JUST ASKED BECAUSE I SAW THE DESCRIPTIO N OF THIS ONE NIELWINK FIC WHERE THEY WERE COUSINS

 

 **jinyoung** : WHA T

 

 **daehwi:** what are you reading sungwoon oh my go d

 

 **ong** : WYM THEY WERE COUSINS OH MY GOD

 

 **minhyun** : sjsjnd what is happening  

 

 **guanlin** : mood

 

 **sungwoon** : ???????

 

 **sungwoon** : oh my go d i didnt mean nielwink were cousins i mEANT 2PARK WERE COUSINS

 

 **jihoon** : fucking chris t

 

 **jaehwan** : u gyts arw a enrtie meaa

 

 **jinyoung** : ok are u drunk or

 

 **jinyoung** : like whats up w u im so confused

 

 **sungwoon** : WHY DID Y’ALL THINK IT WAS INCEST

 

 **woojin** : BC YOU DONT KNOW HOW TO WORD SHIT PROPERLY JFC

 

 **jihoon** : its too early for this

 

 **sungwoon** : y’all deadass thought i would read an incest fic

 

 **sungwoon** : i didnt even read it man i said i justb saw the dESCPRIOTN

 

 **ong** : incesterstandings

 

 **jisung** : w h y

 

 **ong** : it had to be done

 

 **jaehwan** : sHUR THW FYCK UP SWONDWOO

 

 **ong** : swondwoo

 

 **daniel** : a side of incesterstanding sauce please

 

 **daehwi** : im gonna throw up

 

 **minhyun** : all of u get off ur phones and calm down for like 5 minutes dear god

 

 **jinyoung** : sorry dad

 

 **minhyun** : i only accept apologies in cash

 

 **minhyun** : oh wait you’re jinyoung

 

 **minhyun** : i accept your apology

 

 **minhyun** : everyone else needs to put a 20 on my bed by midnight

 

 **ong** : shut up

 

 **daniel** : shut up (2)

 

 **woojin** : ur asking whole ass broke ppl for money

 

 **woojin** : bih

 

 **woojin** : would u like one of my organs instead

 

 **jaehwan** : brhuh im rtyna ear hewe

 

 **jinyoung** : maybe you should stop texting

 

 **guanlin** : ya go to sleep you sound like a mess

 

 **minhyun** : even more of a mess than usual

 

 **jaehwan** : I JSTU WSNNA EAY RAMWB WUTG SIMEONW ///:sjhfcf

 

 **woojin** : stfu and eat your damn fuckernuggets u fuckernugget

 

 **sungwoon** : ?????

 

 **sungwoon** : what does that even mean

 

 **ong** : don’t fuck nuggets guys

 

 **daehwi** : oh my g os d

 

 **jinyoung** : s e o n g w o o

 

 **guanlin** : jfc

 

 **daniel** : did woojin jsut say fuckernuggets or i have i just completely lost it

 

 **sungwoon** : nope, he did in fact say fuckernuggets

 

 **jinyoung** : stop ruining nuggets for everyone

 

 **jisung** : i give up trying to control you guys

 

 **jisung** : my efforts are futile

 

 **jisung** : im going to sleep

 

 **jisung** : take care of them for me minhyun

 

 **minhyun** : will do

 

 **ong** : i think 2park are both in moods right now

 

 **guanlin** : yeah they’re lying on the same bed but they’re on opposite sides

 

 **jinyoung** : wtf since when did they ever let there be space in between them

 

 **guanlin** : THATS WHAT I SAID

 

 **daehwi:** i think jihoon is just in a bad mood for something general and woojin is being really insecure and they’re just both being dumb rn but like whats new right

 

 **daniel** : communication is key guys

 

 **sungwoon** : communication isn’t shoving your tongue down each others throat

 

 **ong** : stfu

 

 **jaehwan** : h ey guts thered a spide r on teh windoe shoulf i ket ir in

 

 **daehwi** : IF U WANNA CATCH THIS BLOCK THEN U CAN TRY

 

 **jihoon** : jaehwan go to the fuck to sleep

 

 **jihoon** : no one wants ramen right now

 

 **jaehwan** : F INW

 

 **jaehwan** : i give iuopki#

 

 **jaehwan** : up

 

 **guanlin** : how did u turn a 2 letter word into like 7 letters

 

 **guanlin** : talent

 

 **woojin** : jihoon

 

 **woojin** : jihoon

 

 **woojin** : jihoooooon

 

 **woojin** : babe

 

 **woojin** : babe

 

 **woojin** : talk to me

 

 **woojin** : b a b e

 

 **daehwi** : shut up and take ur problems to the pms

 

 **woojin** : u think hes gonna reply to me in a pm

 

 **daehwi** : nah but i dont need u spamming this chat

 

 **woojin** : )))))))))))))))))):

  
  
  


**_woojin_** to **_jihoon_** \- 12:30am

 

 **woojin** : babe

 

 **woojin** : are you okay

 

 **woojin** : did i do something wrong for real

 

 **woojin** : because if i did then please tell me

 

 **jihoon** : its not u okay

 

 **jihoon** : im just not feeling well today idk but its not ur fault i promise

 

 **jihoon** : im just tired

 

 **woojin** : okay, i hope you feel better tmrw morning ):

 

 **woojin** : no hugs?

 

 **jihoon:** not really feeling it rn

 

 **jihoon** : but stay beside me

 

 **jihoon** : please

 

 **woojin** : of course

  
  
  


**Pissing Self Association™** \- 1:12am

 

 **woojin** : so

 

 **woojin** : why isnt “fuckernuggets” a good enough reason to let me into the nsfw chat

 

 **daniel** : shut up woojin

 

 **minhyun** : why are you guys still awake

 

 **woojin** : ur awake too

 

 **minhyun** : dont back talk kid

 

 **minhyun** : you’re just adding onto your debt

 

 **woojin** : IM NOT IN DEBT IM B R O K E

 

 **minhyun** : is that not the reason you’re in debt

 

 **woojin** : wow i thought you were the only last tolerable person out of the hyung line

 

 **woojin** : but ur insufferable too hmph

  
  
  


**_woojin_ ** to **_daehwi_ ** \- 1:20am

 

 **woojin** : hey are u awake

 

 **daehwi** : yes

 

 **woojin** : jihoon said that he’s not mad at me

 

 **woojin** : should i believe that?

 

 **woojin** : its not like i dont trust him but i just,,

 

 **woojin** : im scared idk what to do i dont want to fuck things up

 

 **woojin:** i love him a lot and i dont?? wanna lose him bc im dumb and cant figure things out

 

 **daehwi** : dont worry about it hyung

 

 **daehwi** : im sure that if he says ur not the reason then ur not

 

 **daehwi** : i understand that he might just be feeling down

 

 **daehwi:** sometimes theres no concrete reason for it, bad days just come and go

 

 **daehwi** : as long as you let him know that ur there for him if he needs it

 

 **daehwi** : then you’ll be fine

 

 **woojin** : alright, if you say so

 

 **daehwi** : (:

 

 **woojin** : and.. are we good?

 

 **daehwi** : of course why wouldnt we be?

 

 **woojin** : idk im just,, checking

 

 **daehwi** : hey ur stupid but i love you

 

 **daehwi** : stop overthinking things okay?

 

 **daehwi** : get some sleep

 

 **woojin** : i love you

 

 **daehwi** : and i love all these receipts you’re giving me (-:

 

 **woojin** : fuck

 

 **woojin** : i hate soft hours

  
  


**_minhyun_ ** to **_jihoon_ ** \- 1:23am

 

 **minhyun** : you’re probably asleep right now and i don’t know whats going on with you

 

 **minhyun** : but i just want you to know that i’m here if you wanna talk okay?

 

 **minhyun** : don’t try to bottle things up, we’re family and i hope you know that

 

 **minhyun** : never be scared to talk things out with us

 

 **minhyun** : sleep well kid

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um that ended up being more hurt/comfort than i planned for it to be idk where than came from i was kind of just randomly writing this and it ended up going in that direction. if you're wondering what's up with jihoon, don't worry it's just one of those days for him, everyone has bad days but its nothing too serious in this story at least 
> 
> (also what kind of trin fic doesn't have chamhwi thrown into it?) 
> 
> another shoutout again to PSA™ for being the inspiration behind this chapter i'm really glad to have met you guys and you brighten up my day with your wild messages lmao


	9. stupid chicken delivery guy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> on this month's edition of wanna one: behind the scenes
> 
> \- wanna one ruin friendships with overcooked  
> \- woojin still "isn't dating" jihoon  
> \- jinhwi break up for 15 minutes   
> \- jaehwan is a mess but who's counting at this point   
> \+ more

 

 

 

 

 **Nugget Respecters™** — 6:28pm

 

 **jaehwan:** petition to bring zero base back

 

 **jaehwan:** whos signing

 

 **seongwoo:** I

 

 **daniel:** I TOO

 

 **jaehwan:** you were barely there

 

 **daniel:** listen

 

 **daniel:** i have memories too okay

 

 **jinyoung:** i just want my karaoke machine back )’:

 

 **jihoon:** okay but the fOOD

 

 **jihoon:** DO YO U KNOW HOW DISAPPOINTING IT IS TO COME BACK TO THE DORMS

 

 **jihoon:** WITHOUT A WHOLE ASS CHICKEN WAITING FOR ME??? JSDJJD

 

 **woojin:** its ur punishment for stealing my food bitch

 

 **jisung:** ….

 

 **jisung:** you’re really trying to attack jihoon for stealing your food

 

 **jisung:** WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO COMPENSATE FOR MY RAMEN HUH

 

 **jisung:** TBH IM GLAD ZERO BASE IS GONE

 

 **jisung:** MY ANIMALS DESERVE BETTER

 

 **jisung:** A HOME AWAY FROM KANG DANIEL

 

 **daniel:** your animals LOVED me

 

 **daniel:** i was the only fun in their dreary lives pent up in your room

 

 **seongwoo:** guys come to the living room jinyoung brought overcooked

 

 **guanlin:** UM how about we not ruin our friendship while we still have a year with each other

 

 **sungwoon:** nah screw you all lets play hahahahaha

 

 **sungwoon:** its time to ruin friendships

 

 **guanlin:** omg its ongniel against minhwan cast your votes who do you think will kill jaehwan first

 

 **jihoon:** my vote is on minhyun

 

 **woojin:** dude i think seongwoo is gonna choke that bitch real quick

 

 **daehwi:** it’s obviously not daniel. he’s gonna laugh himself to death before he can even think about killing jaehwan

 

 **jinyoung:** definitely minhyun

 

 **jaehwan:** IM NOT GONNA DIE STFU

 

 **woojin:** you’re most likely to fuck things up so

 

 **jihoon:** ur probably going to die

 

 **jaehwan:** i’ll prove you all wron g

 

 **daehwi:** jsjdjsj its been literally 10 seconds

 

 **daehwi:** and seongwoo is alrdy yelling at jaehwan

 

 **jinyoung:** he deserves it wtf is he even doing who let him play

 

 **woojin:** ughhhhh take the controller away from him its hurting my eyes

 

 **jihoon:** “NO ONE FUCKING NEEDS TOMATOES JAEHWAN” an entire mood tbh

 

 **guanlin:** eat ur vegetables jihoon

 

ji **hoon:** you can’t tell me what to do

 

 **daehwi:** beef

 

 **jihoon:** stop talking about food you insensitive rATS

 

 **jinyoung:** whos gonna play with me and daehwi after them?

 

 **woojin:** US

 

 **jinyoung:** whos us

 

 **woojin:** is that even a question

 

 **woojin:** we’re literally an entity

 

 **jihoon:** stop association me with you

 

 **jihoon:** i dont need any more hits to my pride

 

 **woojin:** when will you admit that we’re dating

 

 **jihoon:** never

 

 **guanlin:** have you ever met a more annoying couple

 

 **jihoon:** WE ARENT A COUPLE

 

 **daehwi:** shut up jihoon

 

 **jihoon** : ARE U TRYING TO START A FIGHT U LITTLE GREMLIN

 

 **jinyoung:** ALRIGHT DON'T CALL MY BOYFRIEND A GREMLIN

 

 **guanlin:** chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken

 

 **jihoon:** i fucking hate this family

 

 **daehwi:** that’s what i call a meme i’ve seen 96 times

 

 **jihoon:** like you’ve never said it

 

 **daniel:** oKAY UR UP LITTLE ONES

 

 **woojin:** LETS WIN THIS BABE

 

 **jihoon:** who are you even calling babe

 

 **guanlin:** i kind of dont want them to play anymore

 

 **guanlin:** they might start world war III

 

 **sungwoon:** THE DOWNFALL OF EVERY COUPLE IN THIS HOUSE IS WHAT IM HERE FOR

 

 **minhyun:** why are u such a sadist

 

 **seongwoo:** he recently took the bdsm test and found out he’s 66% sadist

 

 **minhyun:** thats

 

 **minhyun:** really terrifying

 

 **daniel:** time to run

 

 **seongwoo:** im 38% masochist

 

 **daniel:** are u sure its only 38%

 

 **seongwoo:** the test says so

 

 **jisung** : why does everything always come back to the topic of ongniel and choking

 

 **seongwoo** : NO ONE EVEN SAID ANYTHING

 

 **jisung:** WE WERE ALL THINKING IT

 

 **seongwoo:** THEN THATS UR FAULT IS IT NOT

 

 **seongwoo** : U DIRTY MINDED LITTLE SHITS

 

 **minhyun** : yeah jisung why is your mind in the gutter

 

 **jisung** : whA

 

 **jisung** : WHERE THE HECK IS MY MEME FOLDER

 

 **jaehwan** : oh hah a ha ha funny story

 

 **jisung** : does it look like im laughing

 

 **jaehwan** : i accidentally deleted it

 

 **jisung** : SDJFBJSFBHGJSJDKGH

 

 **jisung** : HOW

 

 **jisung** : WHEN

 

 **jisung** : W H Y

 

 **jisung** : WHY DID U EVEN HAVE MY PHONE

 

 **jaehwan** : i was looking for incriminating evidence against sungwoon

 

 **jaehwan** : turns out you’re not that kind of person

 

 **jaehwan** : a little upsetting but idk what i was expecting

 

 **sungwoon** : I TOLD YOU I WASNT SHIT TALKING YOU TO JISUNG

 

 **sungwoon** : why would i need to do it behind your back

 

 **sungwoon** : i already do it to your face

 

 **jaehwan** : okay

 

 **jaehwan** : point taken

 

 **seongwoo** : take a shot every time woojin yells “AIYYAAAA”

 

 **daniel** : take another every time daehwi follows him up with his own “AIYAA”

 

 **seongwoo** : woojin is really letting jihoon sit in his lap like he’s not gonna get whacked in the face a by a controller in a few minutes

 

 **sungwoon** : honestly kind of want to see it

 

 **minhyun** : this isnt fair jinyoung and daehwi are like the perfect pair in everything they do

 

 **guanlin** : you’re just mad because you and jaehwan are the worst team

 

 **jaehwan** : hey i did a good job

 

 **minhyun** : like hell u did

 

 **minhyun** : sit ur ass down

 

 **minhyun** : ur on dinner ban tonight

 

 **jaehwan** : what the fUCK

 

 **jaehwan** : THAT DOESN’T EVEN EXIST

 

 **minhyun** : im sorry who are you?

 

 **sungwoon** : JSDJSDJ

 

 **guanlin** : he’s still mad

 

 **jisung** : as much as i’d love to agree with you on that dinner ban

 

 **jisung** : the moral side of me is saying we can’t

 

 **seongwoo** : join the dark side hyung

 

 **sungwoon** : grant the ban! grant the ban!

 

 **jisung** : I CANT GUYS

 

 **jisung** : YOU KNOW JAEHWAN IS A SNITCH

 

 **guanlin** : y’all really wont let him live

 

 **minhyun** : maybe if he could tell the difference between an onion and a mushroom

 

 **minhyun** : he wouldnt be in this situation

 

 **jaehwan** : YOU MAKE ONE. FUCKING. MISTAKE.

 

 **jaehwan** : icb this

 

 **jisung** : HW ABOUT YOU RESURRECT MY MEME FOLDER

 

 **jaehwan** : LET IT GO

 

 **jisung** : I SPENT A YEAR COLLECTING THOSE

 

 **jisung** : HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO EXPRESS MYSELF NOW???

 

 **seongwoo** : GUYS SHUT UP SOMETHING MORE IMPORTANT IS HAPPENING

 

 **seongwoo** : JINYOUNG AND DAEHWI ARE FIGHTING

 

 **daniel** : JINYOUNG JUST SAID AND I QUOTE: “SHUT THE HELL UP DAEHWI”

 

 **sungwoon** : I LOVE COUPLE QUARRELS

 

 **minhyun** : DAEHWI JUST KICKED JINYOUNG OFF OF THE COUCH

 

 **seongwoo** : “I NEED TO SERVE”

 

 **seongwoo** : YES YOU SERVE THOSE L O O K S DAEHWI

 

 **sungwoon** : wait i just realized if they fight im gonna have to be the middle man

 

 **sungwoon** : I DONT WANT THIS ANYMORE

 

 **daniel** : rip sungwoon they just broke up

 

 **seongwoo** : THEY MISSED 2 STARS BY LIKE 5 POINTS HAHAHAHAHAH

 

 **seongwoo** : i love watching other people fail

 

 **guanlin** : come on jisung lets show them ohw to play

 

 **jisung** : LEADER

 

 **guanlin** : MAKNAE

 

 **jisung** : CROSS

 

 **woojin** : so i’ve come to the realization that it is true, i do not have a boyfriend

 

 **jihoon** : get oVER IT WOOJIN.

 

 **woojin** : YOU WOULDN'T EVEN LET ME CARRY THE POT

 

 **jihoon** : YOU’RE ALWAYS SPILLING YOUR HOT CHOCOLATE ON ME

 

 **jihoon** : LIKE HELL I'M LETTING YOU CARRY AN ENTIRE FUCKING POT ACROSS THE KITCHEN

 

 **woojin** : YOU CAN'T EVEN SPILL THE SOUP IN THE GAME WHAT THE FUCK

 

 **jihoon** : WELL YOU WERE GONNA FUCK SOMETHING UP SOMEHOW AND I DIDNT WANNA CLEAN UP YOUR MESS

 

 **minhyun** : WTF HOW ARE JISUNG AND GUANLIN SO GOOD AT THIS

 

 **jaehwan** : its what happens when you don't hate each other

 

 **jaehwan** : must be nice to not have enemies

 

 **jaehwan** : i wouldn't know

 

 **jaehwan** : cause everyone hATES ME

 

 **minhyun** : well

 

 **minhyun** : ur not wrong

 

 **woojin** : hELP THE HOT WATER MACHINE THINGY ISNT WORKING

 

 **woojin** : i JUST WANT TO EAT RAMEN

 

 **daehwi** : its called a kettle wtf 

 

 **woojin** : @jihoon come help me you spork

 

 **jihoon** : did you just call me a /spork/

 

 **woojin** : ya ur the utensil nobody wants

 

 **jihoon** : well fine if you don’t want me then

 

 **woojin** : no wait i want you

 

 **daehwi** : god woojin you are so /easy/

 

 **woojin** : shut up no one asked you go back to ur ex-boyfriend

 

 **daehwi** : actually we got back together after we got 3 stars on that last level

 

 **woojin** : WHERES MY FUCKING SPORK

 

 **jihoon** : I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING SPORK YOU SALMONELLIC BITCH

 

 **woojin** : THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD

 

 **jihoon** : YOU’RE NOT A WORD

 

 **jisung** : oh yeah lets order food what do you guys want

 

 **jihoon** : CHICKEN

 

 **jinyoung** : PIZZA

 

 **jisung** : okay chicken and pizza it is whos making the call nOT ME

 

 **sungwoon** : i volunteer jaehwan

 

 **daehwi** : me too

 

 **guanlin** : same

 

 **jaehwan** : dammit

 

 **jaehwan** : why does it always gotta be me

 

 **guanlin** : we’re helping you overcome your fear

 

 **minhyun** : okay we need to find a new game to do

 

 **minhyun** : clearly this isnt good for us

 

 **sungwoon** : how about spin the bottle?

 

 **seongwoo** : literally half of us are dating each other fuck that

 

 **jihoon** : yeah no one else is allowed to kiss my dumb ass boyfriend

 

 **woojin** : he’s mistaken i'm not dating this Playground Bully

 

 **daniel** : i accidentally built a bomb once

 

 **seongwoo** : what

 

 **guanlin** : what

 

 **jinyoung** : what

 

 **jihoon** : the

 

 **jaehwan** : fuck

 

 **daehwi** : um??? relevance?? where are you????

 

 **daniel** : idk i was just reminded of it

 

 **guanlin** : wait how do you /accidentally/ build a bomb?

 

 **daniel** : on new years i was collecting fireworks that didnt go off

 

 **daniel** : and collected all the powder

 

 **daniel** : and then i put it all in a tube

 

 **daniel** : and you know those mosquito repellant things?

 

 **minhyun** : the green swirly thing that you light?

 

 **daniel** : ya i lit it and put it inside

 

 **woojin** : LIT

 

 **woojin** : literally

 

 **sungwoon** : WHY

 

 **daniel** : I DIDNT EXPECT IT TO BE A HUGE EXPLOSION

 

 **jihoon** : jfc what happened

 

 **daniel** : i was fine it was so cool

 

 **seongwoo** : you sir

 

 **seongwoo** : are a dangerous man

 

 **daniel** : my ears were ringing for an entire day

 

 **jinyoung** : smh icb u

 

 **daniel** : o ya i also almost blew up my house when i was a kid

 

 **jisung** : aLRIGHT MOVING ON  

 

 **woojin** : GUESS WHO HAS THEIR NINTENDO SWITCH LETS GOOO

 

 **daehwi** : omg i'm so good at quick draw JINYOUNG LETS DUEL

 

 **jinyoung** : I THOUGHT WE MADE UP

 

 **daehwi** : IDC LETS DUEL

  
  


**Nugget Respecters™** — 7:51pm

 

 **sungwoon** : JISUNG COME OUT OF YOUR ROOM AND ANSWER THE DOOR PIZZA IS HERE

 

 **jisung** : JAEHWAN ANSWER THE DOOR

 

 **jisung** : I'M CHANGIN G

 

 **jaehwan** : WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME

  
  
  


**Nugget Respecters™** — 8:02pm

 

 **daehwi** : oKAY WHAT HAPPENED AT THE DOOR WHY ARE THEY YELLING AT JAEHWAN

 

 **sungwoon** : hE T RIED TO TIP THE GUY 30% HDHFDSF

 

 **jinyoung** : what oh my god

 

 **seongwoo** : oKAY GUYS WAIT HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED

 

 **seongwoo** : so the pizza guy is at the door right, and then jaehwan gave him the money and then he walks awa y

 

 **seongwoo** : like he goes to his car, then comes back and he’s like “yeah i don't have change”

 

 **jaehwan** : n o NO CAUSE HE

 

 **jaehwan** : he assumed he was gonna keep the change

 

 **daehwi** : hE’S SUPPOSED TO

 

 **daehwi** : we gave you $100 you let him keep the extra $9

 

 **seongwoo** : wHYD HE COME BACK THEN

 

 **jaehwan** : CAUSE HE SAW ME STANDING AT THE DOOR I WAS SO CONFUSED I WAS LIKE.. DID HE JUST TAKE MY EXTRA MONEY?? DID HE JUST TAKE IT AND LEAVE

 

 **minhyun** : THAT WAS THE TIP

 

 **sungwoon** : YOU MADE HIM FEEL BAD

 

 **seongwoo** : OKAY SO THEN JAEHWAN CONFRONTS ME LIKE “HE DOESN’T HAVE CHANGE DO I TELL HIM TO KEEP THE CHANGE” AND I SAY YEAH

 

 **seongwoo** : BUT THEN THEY GUY GIVES THE BILLS BACK AND HES LIKE “ITS OKAY YOU CAN JUST PAY DEBIT, I DON'T NEED THE TIP. ITS FINE I’LL BE FINE”

 

 **guanlin** : jAEHWA N YOU’RE HORRIBLE

 

 **daniel** : THAT'S SO S A D

 

 **jaehwan** : OK THE REASON I WAS JUST STANDING THERE WAS CAUSE HE JUST TOOK THE MONEY WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING

 

 **woojin** : so how much did you end up paying after you switched to debit

 

 **jaehwan** : i tipped 10%

 

 **jaehwan** : so that's like $9

 

 **daehwi** : ??????????

 

 **jihoon** : ???????? JAEHWAN.

 

 **minhyun** : YOU WERE ALREADY GIVING HIM $9 BY LETTING HIM KEEP THE CHANGE JKFSHGDKJH

 

 **jinyoung:**  I'M FUC KING CRYING

 

 **daniel** : looooooooooooooool

 

 **daniel** : lol lol lol lol

 

 **jaehwan** : OKAY SHUT UP AND EAT YOUR GODDAMN CHICKENPPL

 

 **jaehwan** : GEEZ

 

 **woojin** : HAHAHAHAHA

 

 **jaehwan** : SHUT IT WOOJIN

 

 **jisung** : i'm so

 

 **sungwoon** : same

 

 **sungwoon** : you should have answered the door dude

 

 **jisung** : i realize my mistake now

 

 **daniel** : poor delivery guy

 

 **jihoon** : i'm gonna go get chicken

 

 **jihoon** : spicy or regular?

 

 **woojin** : spicy with feelings

 

 **jihoon** : what the fuck

 

 **woojin** : are we not talking about that

 

 **jisung** : stop wilding out New Adults

 

 **jihoon** : WE’RE TALKING ABOUT CHICKEN YOU FREAK

 

 **woojin** : okay cool

 

 **woojin** : get me a piece too mistlebro

 

 **jihoon** : did u just fucking bro-zone me

 

 **jihoon** : it’s not even christmas anymore

 

 **woojin** : bromance season is every season

 

 **woojin** : lets turn on a video of a fireplace on my laptop and cuddle beside it

 

 **jihoon** : ur dumb

 

 **jihoon** : but i'm down

 

 **woojin** : of course you are

 

 **jinyoung** : daehwi i love you

 

 **daehwi** : i know

 

 **jinyoung** : …

 

 **jinyoung** : …..

 

 **daehwi** : yes?

 

 **jinyoung** : “i love you too jinyoung you’re so wonderful and sweet and considerate”

 

 **daehwi** : how about

 

 **daehwi** : “i love you jinyoung you’re so terrible at distinguishing onions from mushrooms but it’s okay because if you’re dumb that means i'm the smart one”

 

 **jinyoung** : we will never get over this game will we

 

 **guanlin** : i don't think anyone will

 

 **guanlin** : minhwan is a dead ship forever

 

 **jinyoung** : i just wanna cuddle near a fireplace damn

 

 **jisung** : lets all reconcile over dinner please

 

 **jisung** : i don't need to hold anymore couples counseling sessions in my room

 

 **daniel** : aw but those are fun

 

 **jisung** : you just say that because you like to frustrate me

 

 **daniel** : exactly that's why it’s fun D:

 

 **daniel** : OH MY GOD i didn’t mean to make a sad face

 

 **daniel** : :DDDDD

 

 **seongwoo** : you’re so precious

 

 **jaehwan** : MINHYUN

 

 **minhyun** : shut up

 

 **jaehwan** : okay

 

 **minhyun** : i'm gonna go write an apology letter to the delivery guy you upset

 

 **jaehwan** : tell him he’s welcome for the $9

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	10. finding piglet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> daehwi asks maknae line for help winning a bet  
> \+ drunk hyung line after a messy game of contact mode over text

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the lack of humor in this one its hard to be funny when ur depressed :-)  
> but i did want to update before finals so here u go

 

 **Wild Childs™** —  _9:40pm_

 **annie** : GUYS HELP I NEED TO WIN A BET 

 **annie** : PLS BE USEFUL FOR ONCE

 **pigeon** : well good evening to you too daehwi. 

 **annie** : ESPECIALLY YOU WOOJIN. WHAT DO YOU EVEN DO HONESTLY.

 **pigeon** : u wanna try that again buddy

 **pigeon** : i don't think that's how u should be talking to someone u need rn 

 **annie** : whateva i don't need u

 **annie** : JINYOUNG JIHOON GUANLIN WHERE ARE YOU HELP ME

 **pigeon** : wow

 **baebeautyxoxo** : present

 **baebeautyxoxo** : WAIRT WHO CHANGED MY NAME WTF ISTHIS

 **fibbitch** : ya why is mine like this who r u calling a bitch

 **panininoggin** : PANININOGGIN

 **panininoggin** : WOOJIN

 **pigeon** : i got bored

 **pigeon** : jinyoung’s a contour legend i gave u a beauty guru youtuber name ur welcome

 **pigeon** : jihoon ur a lying ass bitch

 **pigeon** : and guanlin ur a panini head but head was boring so ur a panini noggin now

 **pigeon** : and daehwi’s is obvious he’s an orange

 **fibbitch** : i hate u,, get brick slapped

 **panininoggin** : brick slapped????

 **fibbitch** : BITCH**** SLAPPED

 **fibbitch** : FUCKING BRICK SLAPPED WH AT

 **baebeautyxoxo** : YES BRICK SLAP ME QUEEN

 **fibbitch** : stfu jinyoung

 **pigeon** : anyways daehwi u were saying

 **annie** : ugh

 **annie** : ANYWAYS

 **annie** : I'M AT MY AUNTS HOUSE

 **annie** : AND ME AND MY COUSIN ARE HAVING A BET

 **annie** : WE USED TO HAVE THIS FAMILY FRIEND AND WE FORGOT HIS NAME

 **annie** : IT WAS EITHER PIGLET OR PIBET

 **annie** : AND HIS BROTHER (we call him woong) WHO IS LIKE 10 YEARS OLD HAS A YT CHANNEL

 **annie** : WE'VE BEEN WATCHING HIS VIDEOS TO FIND OUT HIS BROTHER’S NAME

 **anni** e: RIGHT NOW I'M ON HIS 20 SUBS Q&A IN HOPES THAT SOMEONE WOULD ASK HIM ABOUT HIS FAMILY

 **panininoggin** : WAIT

 **panininoggin** : PIGLET???? HIS NAME IS PIGLET??

 **baebeautyxoxo** : or pibet

 **panininoggin** : STILL

 **fibbitch** : HOW DO YOU GO FROM WOONG TO FUCKING PIGLET IMNFJDKGHD

 **fibbitch** : TF KIND OF NAME IS PIGLET 

 **annie** : ITS A NICKNAME BUT EVERYONE CALLED HIM IT

 **annie** : mY COUSIN THINKS IT WAS PIBET BUT I SWEAR I WAS PIGLET

 **annie** : tbh now sure what his real name is i'm a terrible person BUT

 **annie** : THERE IS 20 BUCKS ON THE LINE WHICH LIKE ISNT /MUCH/ BUT YOU GUYS KNOW I LIKE TO WIN AND I AM NOT!! LOSING!!!

 **annie** : NO ONE IS SLEEPING UNTIL WE FIGURE THIS OUT

 **pigeon** : if its not piglet then that's gonna be ur new nickname

 **annie** : GREAT. NOW MY NAME IS ON THE LINE

 **annie** :  [ https://www.youtube.com/user/leewoong](https://www.youtube.com/user/leewoong)

 **fibbitch** : okay but does pibet not sound a little more plausible than piglet

 **baebeautyxoxo** : no

 **panininoggin** : idk i think its piglet

 **panininoggin** : like maybe his nose looks like a pig snout or smth

 **fibbitch** : GUANLIN

 **panininoggin** : just trying to narrow it down

 **annie** : i’ll give $10 to whoever helps me find it

 **pigeon** : on it

 **annie** : yeah ur on it bc of the money /////:

 **fibbitch** : i wanna help

 **pigeon** : HE HAS A VIDEO FOR 40 SUBS goals

 **baebeautyxoxo** : omg i'm gonna search his vids too

 **panininoggin** : I JUST WATCHED A “SHOUT OUT SATURDAY” VID BC I THOUGHT HE WOULD GIVE A SHOUTOUT TO HIS BRO

 **panininoggin** : BUT HE’S FAKE

 **fibbitch** : LMAO don't attack him he’s 10

 **pigeon** : oh god am i gonna have to search through his minecraft vids

 **annie** : that's what i'm afraif od hgdkjh

 **baebeautyxoxo** : okay so i'm watching a vlog and he said “i'm going to a resutaurant with my brother” bUT HE DIDN’T SAY HIS NAME

 **annie** : YA WE WATCHED THAT

 **annie** : WE ALSO WATCHED HIS HOUSE TOUR

 **panininoggin** : ded

 **annie** : HE DIDN’T GO TO HIS BROTHER’S ROOM???? WHAT KIND OF HOUSE TOUR DOESN’T INCLUDE ROOMS

 **annie** : HE LITERALLY WENT TO HIS ROOM AND THE LIVING ROOM AND SAID THE OTHER PLACES WERE OFF LIMITS

 **annie** : iM SO SAD

 **pigeon** : why am i spending my night watching vids of a random kid to help you win a bet

 **fibbitch** : rt

 **annie** : BC UR GREAT FRIENDS

 **baebeautyxoxo** : BRO HE WAVED A WAND AND SAID “COPYRIGHT REMOVAL” I'M CRYING

 **pigeon** : STOP JOINING PPL I WANNA WIN

 **fibbitch** : u didn’t even wanna help in the first place my dude

 **pigeon** : not the point

 **pigeon** : DOES ANY HAVE HIM FAMILY HAVE SOCIAL MEDIA I'M GONNA FB STALK

 **annie** : I THINK HIS MOM DOES

 **annie** : just search Lee Jaehwa

 **annie** : WAIT

 **annie** : hER FB HAS FETUS PHOTOS OF ME

 **annie** : I JUST REMEMBERED HFJLDHFDHA

 **annie:** FML

 **annie** : I PLAYED MYSELF

 **pigeon** : whatevr u were a cute kid

 **pigeon** : not anymore tho

 **annie** : will u please leave

 **panininoggin** : HIS INSTA IS LOCKED I'M SALT

 **fibbitch** : U FOUND HIS INSTA

 **panininoggin** : nO HIS BROTHERS

 **panininoggin** : WAT DO U HAVE TO HIDE

 **panininoggin** : mY FETUS PICS ARE ON THE INTERNET FOREVER TOO

 **pigeon** : WHY IS HER FB SO DRY I'M STRESSED OUT

 **baebeautyxoxo** : someone ask hyunmin

 **baebeautyxoxo** : he’s in the pictures lmao

 **pigeon** : seriously??

 **pigeon** : wait lemme text

 

 

﹏

 

 

 

 _ **woojin**_ to _**hyunmin —** 10:21pm_

 **woojin** : BRO U ALIVE

 

 

 

﹏

 

 

 **Wild Childs™**  — 10 _:29pm_

 **pigeon** : dammit he’s not replying

 **fibbitch** : oo screened

 **pigeon** : shut up

 **panininoggin** : ugh i can't find a twitter either

 **annie** : WAIT WHAT WYM HYUNMIN IS IN A PICTURE

 **baebeautyxoxo** : ya he’s in like 50 of them

 **annie** : ON THE MOMS FB??

 **annie** : i literally don't see anything on her fb????

 **pigeon** : ME NEITHER

 **baebeautyxoxo** : ARE U BLOCKED HAHAHAHAAH

 **annie** : NO WTH

 **pigeon** : THERE'S LITERALLY NOTHING WHERE I'M LOOKING

 **baebeautyxoxo** : _sent a photo_

 **pigeon** : WHERE ARE THOSE WJY CAN'T I SEE

 **fibbitch** : u have rly bad luck

 **pigeon** : THAT MAKES NO SENSE

 **annie** : I'M AO ONDUFHED WHOSE FB IS THAT

 **baebeautyxoxo** : THE MOMS

 **panininoggin** : fate literally hates you guys

 **annie** : AM I BLOCKED???

 **pigeon** : _sent a photo_

 **pigeon** : BITCH WHERE????

 **pigeon** : there's literally nothing what the fuck

 **pigeon** : its not like i would be blocked

 **annie** : I SEE THAT TOO

 **panininoggin** : i WAS SO CLOSE TO FINDING IT OUT DAMMIT

 **panininoggin** : I WAS WATCHING ONE OF HIS VLOGS AND HE STOPS THE CAMERA IN FRONT OF HIS BROTHER

 **panininoggin** : AND HE CALLS HIM

 **panininoggin** : BUT HE CALLED HIM IDIOT

 **panininoggin** : I FEEL BAITED

 **fibbitch** : hAHAHAHAH WHY CAN'T HE SAY IT JUST O N C E JFC

 **baebeautyxoxo** : hwow old is piglet anyways

 **annie** : idk i'm pretty sure he’s like 4 years younger

 **baebeautyxoxo** : tempted to follow his bro on insta lmao

 **fibbitch** : do it

 **baebeautyxoxo** : who wants his sc

 **fibbitch** : YOU HAVE HIS SNAPCHAT HAHAHA WTF HOW

 **fibbitch** : wait you can't see things until they add you back

 **baebeautyxoxo** : ya

 **baebeautyxoxo** : but u can see him dabbing

 **fibbitch** : ffffffff

 **panininoggin** : guys im still on his vlogs 

 **panininoggin** : “so… i have blonde hair now guys, i bleached it if u haven’t noticed… 2 months ago” iS HE SHADING HIS VIEWERS

 **pigeo** n: i swear if we wasted our time only for daehwi to lose

 **pigeon** : ur gonna get a face full of fist

 **annie** : HEY

 **annie** : hAVE FAITH IN ME WOULD YA

 **pigeon** : no thanks

 **pigeon** : that's asking for too much

 **annie** : rude ass

 

 

 

﹏

 

 

 

 

 _ **hyunmin**_ to _**woojin —** 10:49pm_

 **hyunmin** : ya what up

 **woojin** : oMG

 **woojin** : ok so like daehwi needs to know smth

 **woojin** : he’s family friends with this dude

 **woojin** : _sent a_ _photo_

 **woojin** : and he can’t remember his name lmao

 **hyunmin** : oh his name is dohyun

 **hyunmin** : but normally we call him by a nickname

 **woojin** : YA WHATS THE NICKNAME

 **hyunmin** : piglet lmao

 **woojin** : FDJKGH THANKS DUDE

 

 

 

﹏

 

 

 

 

 **Wild Childs™** - _11:00pm_

 **pigeon** : _sent a photo_

 **pigeon** : I WIN BITCHES

 **panininoggin** : nOOOOO

 **panininoggin** : DO U KNOW HOW LONG I SPENT WATCHING HIS VIDEOS

 **panininoggin** : A WHOLE HOUR

 **panininoggin** : i WANTED TO WIN

 **annie** : HSHDJKSDHGWOOOOOO I WIN

 **annie** : THANKS LOVE I OWE YOU

 **pigeon** : hell ya u do

 **annie** : ya i’ll give u $10

 **pigeon** : litty

 **fibbitch** : FUCK

 **fibbitch** : i MADE AN IG ACC JUST TO FOLLOW WOONG HAHAHAH

 **baebeautyxoxo** : GJKDFGHJKDBH LMAO

 **annie** : my cousin just found out he’s actually guanlin’s age???

 **annie** : i SWEAR HE WAS LIKE 4 YEARS YOUNGER

 **annie** : i refuse to believe

 **pigeon** : check his id

 **annie:**  nah he probs has a fake id anyways

 **panininoggin** : SMH

 **annie** : HES LIKE 13 I PROMISE

 **annie:**  they can’t deceive me

 **baebeautyxoxo** : take a blood test

 **pigeon** : face the facts my dude

 **annie** : A BLOOD TEST

 **annie:**  HOW IS THAT

 **annie** :  GONNA DETERMINE

 **pigeon** : BLOOD TTESy

 **annie** : HIS AGE

 **fibbitch** : HAHAHAHAHA

 **baebeautyxoxo** : idk lol

 **fibbitch** : I CAN'T

 **fibbitch** : “YUP 16 YEAR OLD BLOOD”

 **pigeon** : THIS ISNT A DRAMA U DON'T JUST GET A BLOOD TEST TO SOLVE ALL UR PROBLEMS

 **fibbitch** : I CAN'T FUCKING BREATHE

 **panininoggin** : 16 YEAR OLD BLOOD I'M ACTUALLY CRYIN

 **pigeon** : I'M STILL LAUGHING HELP

 **annie** : HNNN OK THANK U AGAIN FRIENDS U CAN GO TO SLEEP NOW SEE U ALL TMRW <3333

 **baebeautyxoxo** : GOODNIGHT BABE I MISS U OUR ROOM IS SO LONELY )):

 **annie** : i miss you too <333

 **pigeon** : its been a day u weaklings

 **baebeautyxoxo** : ok did u not cry when jihoon went to school that one day

 **pigeon** : show me the evidence

 **pigeon** : proof or it never happened

 **baebeautyxoxo** : but it did

 **panininoggin** : it did

 **pigeon** : u'd make a horrible lawyer u know that

 **pigeon** : "i cant prove my client is innocent but i swear he didnt do it!"

 **baebeautyxoxo** : OK BUT I HAVE A WITNESS

 **baebeautyxoxo** : guanlin tell him

 **pigeon** : witnesses aren't reliable 

 **fibbitc** h: i can confirm that u cried

 **pigeon** : BITCH U WERENT EVEN THERE

 **pigeon** : WHY

 **pigeon** : BECAUSE U WENT TO SCHOOL

 **panininoggin** : im sensing some deeply rooted attachment issues from all of u

 

 

 

﹏

 

 

 

 **Nugget Respecters™** — 11:07pm

 **jihoon** : would any of y’all ever name ur kid piglet

 **ong** : hell ya

 **jihoon** : ok maybe i expected too much

 **minhyun** : why

 **minhyun** : do you know someone named piglet

 **woojin** : we just helped daehwi find his long lost family friend piglet

 **sungwoon** : hAHAHA WHAT

 **woojin** : ya i won $10

 **sungwoon** : wtf why didn’t he ask us

 **guanlin** : sorry maknae line only

 **ong** : why is our line so lame

 **ong** : JISUNG

 **jisung** : what

 **ong** : oUR LINE IS SO LAME

 **jisung** : maybe if u werent in it we wouldn't be

 **ong** : OUCH

 **jaehwan** : damn are u in a Mood

 **woojin** : okay who wants to write a fic with me

 **daniel** : what are u writing a fic for

 **woojin** : i'm gonna mess with people and write about real things but no one will know they’re real bc no one will know its me :))))

 **jihoon** : they’ll know from ur shitty writing honey

 **woojin** : wow ok love u too honey bunny

 **jihoon** : don't call me tht

 **woojin** : come write this fic with me

 **jihoon** : as long as its not nsfw then fine

 **woojin** : aw why not

 **jihoon** : do u want death woojin

 **woojin** : no sir

 **jisung** : [ http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html ](http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html)

**jisung** : guys i just read this and my head hurts

 **minhyun** : you’re telling me i was jaehwan in my past life

 **daniel** : we’re really all the same person

 **ong** : SO I'M DANIEL’S THIGH AT ONE POINT IN TIME

 **ong** : AMAZING

 **sungwoon** : i don't think that's how it works…

 **ong** : u don't know that

 **sungwoon** : i know that ur not just reincarnated into a single body part???

 **ong** : but why not

 **jisung** : why would you even want to be one body part what can u do as a thigh seongwoo tell me

 **ong** : seduce people

 **jihoon** : jskdhsf

 **minhyun** : what if u werent a nice thigh

 **ong** : i'm daniel’s thigh ofc i'm nice

 **jaehwan** : what if its someone else’s thigh

 **jinyoung** : you know what would be great

 **jinyoung** : if our tangents weren’t so sTUPID

 **woojin** : ok says the one who suggested takin a blood test to figure out someone’s age

 **jisung** : LMAO

 **minhyun** : he said that?

 **woojin** : ya he’s as dumb as the rest of us

 **jaehwan** : wait can u actually do that

 **jihoon** : and there's the other idiot

 **daniel** : guys i'm bored lets play contact mode

 **jinyoung** : oVER TEXT

 **jinyoung** : how do you even do that

 **daniel** : wym how

 **jinyoung** : you have to count down do you not

 **daniel** : whatever we’ll make it work ok GO

 **jaehwan** : ME ME I’LL START

 **guanlin** : wait how do you play this again

 **jihoon** : someone picks a word and gives us the first letter and we try to narrow it down by giving hints for words that start with that same letter

 **jihoon** : like if jaehwan’s word is coffee, i can give “vegetable” as a hint and then someone counts down from 10 w me and we have to say the word i'm thinking of (carrot)

 **jihoon** : jaehwan could also interject by saying “contact mode” and guessing my word before we say it

 **jihoon** : and if he doesn’t and we get it right then he has to give us the next letter and we just guess the whole word

 **jaehwan** : OKAY THE LETTER IS E

 **daniel** : egg

 **sungwoon** : entourage

 **ong** : smh guys give hints don't just end the game

 **minhyun** : um its round

 **jisung** : CONTACT MODE

 **jisung** : HOW DO WE COUNT DOWN

 **minhyun** : iDK JUST DO IT 10 9 ISUJGHKFDGH 06 321

 **minhyun** : EARTH

 **jisung** : ELECTRONEVERMIND

 **jinyoung** : ELECTRONEVERMIND WHAT

 **woojin** : WAHAT THE UFGBFD IS RTHAT

 **jisung** : IDK DJJSDSJ I PANICKED

 **sungwoon** : ok but what were you even going to say

 **jisung** : iDK I'M NOT A SCIENCE PERSON DON'T ATTSCK

 **minhyun** : damn it jisung

 **guanlin** : its an animal

 **jinyoung** : CONTACT MODE

 **jinyoung** : 10 9 8945784368734534

 **guanlin** : ELEPHANT

 **jinyoung** : ELEPHANT

 **jaehwan** :  WAIT I FORGOT I COULD CUT U OFF

 **jinyoung** : TOO LATE WE GOT IT

 **daniel** : NEXT LETTER

 **jaehwan** : hHHhhhh

 **jaehwan** : next letter is U

 **ong** : esophagus

 **ong** : wait

 **woojin** : BRO ARE U DUMB

 **jihoon** : U LITERALLY HAD TO SPELL IT OUT AND U DIDNT QUESTION IT

 **guanlin** : HAHAHAHA

 **jinyoung** : seongwoo my man get it together

 **ong** : I REALIZED OK

 **jihoon** : WIAT I HAVE A GUESS

 **jihoon** : euphoria

 **jaehwan** : damn

 **jaehwan** : u got it

 **ong** : WAT AWWW

 **minhyun** : did u google that word jaehwan

 **jaehwan** : ya

 **minhyun:** thought so

 **minhyun** : whos next

 **guanlin** : me me me

 **guanlin** : A

 **jinyoung** : Suddenly my brain isnt working

 **jisung** : do any of ours ever

 **jinyoung** : u right

 ** _daniel_** : its an aardvark

 **daniel** : i MEAN

 **daniel** : AN ANIMAL

 **daniel** : FUCK

 **woojin** : NHDJSFSKGHAHAHAHAHAHA

 **sungwoon** : WAY TO GO DANIEL

 **daniel** : MY FINGER SLIPPED

 **sungwoon** : ONTO 7 DIFFERENT LETTERS???

 **daniel** : yES

 **jihoon** : uhhhhh a fruit

 **jaehwan** : CONTACTMOD E

 **jihoon** : 10 9 8 7 6 6 5 4  3 2 1

 **jihoon** : apple

 **jaehwan** : BROCCOLI

 **jisung** : what

 **guanlin:** what

 **jihoon** : JAEHWAN

 **jihoon** : FIRST OF ALL ITS SUPPOSED TO START WITH AN A

 **jihoon** : SECOND OF ALL BROCCOLI ISNT A FRUIT U DUMBASS

 **jinyoung** : why are u all so stupid

 **jaehwan** : I COULDN'T THINK PROPERLYSSORRY

 **jihoon** : icb this

 **woojin** : CAN WE HURRY TF UP AND GET ONE RIGHT SO WE CAN GET THE NEXT LETTER GEEZ

 **woojin** : OK HINT

 **woojin** : 2pm

 **jihoon** : cONTACT MODE 109304835843956375

 **woojin** : AFTERNOON

 **jihoon** : AFTERNOON

 **ong** : BTCH I THOUHT U MEANT THEGROUP

 **guanlin** : SAME I WAS ABOUT TO CUT U OFF WITH AGAIN AND AGAIN

 **woojin** : cause you guys don't have the intellect that jihoon and i have

 **woojin** : good job babe

 **ong** : THIS IS DUMB WHY R WE PLAYGN THIS ONLIN   IT DOSNT WOKR

 **jihoon** : guanlin next letter

 **sungwoon** : guys i found the problem

 **sungwoon** : daniel seongwoo and jaehwan are drinking in our living room

 **sungwoon** : who tf let daniel and seongwoo into our dorm

 **jaehwan** : i wasbored and y’all are lame sue Me

 **sungwoon** : tf u mean i'm lame i'm joining

 **woojin** : i’d join but honestly sometimes its fun being the sober ones

 **woojin** : you guys say some dumb shit when ur drunk

  
  
  


**Nugget Respecters™** — _1:08am_

 

 **sungwoon** : u know giraffes don't get their necsk from stretching then

 **sungwoon** : its called natural selecton

 **sungwoon** : and like tall giraffes could reach trees n eat leaves so they survivd more than shortgifrafe s

 **sungwoon** : who couldn't reach and eat so thy starevd to death

 **woojin** : so like u

 **sungwoon** : are you asaying i'm gonna dir

 **sungwoon** : die

 **jinyoung** : someone put him to sleep

 **jaehwan** : DNT LEAVE ME GUYS DNT LEAVE ME ALONE

 **jaehwan** : i'm GONNA DEFRIEND ALL OF U ON FACEBOOK

 **jihoon** : “defriend” sir its unfriend and who even uses fb

 **guanlin** : do u even /have/ fb

 **jaehwan** : I'M LEAVIGN THE GROUP CHATDFS

 **jaehwan** : wHERES THE DELETE GROUP BUTTON

 **jaehwan** : HLEP ME

 **danie** l: JISNGU IS TRYING TO KCIK ME OUT ))):

 **daniel** : HESObMEAN TO BEMME

 **daniel** : i can't beleve hes not drunk yet

 **daniel** : i cant

 **daniel** : i cant even see him

 **daniel:** but i can see hwo much of a bad friend hes beingb

 **guanlin** : someone take their phones away

 **guanlin** : minhyun take their phones away

 **minhyun** : ok me and jisung are gonna put them to sleep

 **minhyun** : go to sleep guys

 **minhyun** : guanlin u can come back now

 **minhyun** : and watch over sungwoon and jaehwan while we bring these two back

 **guanlin** : okay

 **jisung** : woojin open the door in like 5 mins

 **jisung** : jk maybe 10

 **jisung** : i have to lug daniel’s huge ass body all the way there

 **woojin** : lmao good luck

 

 

 

 

﹏

 

 

 

 **Nugget Respecters™**  — _9:03am_

 **daehwi** : of course i come back to this 

 **daehwi** : also jaehwan please refrain from sending me drunk voice message confessions from now on

 **woojin** : drop the @

 **woojin** : i mean the audio

 **daehwi** : _(10) voice messages forwarded from **jaehwan**_

 **jaehwan** : this is character slander

 **daehwi** : honey you do this to yourself

 **jinyoung** : babe dont call him honey ur giving him false hope 

 **jaehwan** : i DONT EVEN LIKE U 

 **daehwi** : whatever helps u sleep at night

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> for wanna one fangirling follow me on twitter @holywoojin  
> (btw comments make my day)
> 
> hit me up here too [curiouscat.me/holywoojin](https://curiouscat.me/holywoojin)  
> 


End file.
